Post by Aiden Mumble on Dec 3, 2017 22:25:34 GMT -5
Not in the theater, but in one of the nearby rehearsal rooms, a group of about fifteen dance students were gathered. Some remained off to the sides, stretching and trying to cool down after a long rehearsal. The winter recital was rapidly approaching and everyone was working extra hard to make sure they got put in their favorite numbers. Everyone except Aiden, of course, who usually purposefully danced outside her assigned spacing so less people could see her.
At this point in the year all the upper classmen will have learned each piece going into the performance and then Todrick, their instructor, will assign who goes where. Today, in fact, was the day. Not everyone in the room was old enough to participate, they would be performing in a less formal setting for grades. This was the second recital Aiden was qualified to participate in. However, she had seen to it that she had been "sick" for the first one. She was planning on being sick for this one too, only in her current state of turmoil it would be far closer to the truth than last time.
She was currently on the floor with five other students finishing up a contemporary piece to the sound of Todrick clapping to the beat and shouting things like: "One, two, three, break and turn and six, seven, KYLE! Step step, leeean, Carly watch your spacing, girl! Here it comes! Knife to the heart, Aiden more sad, less anger! Six, seven, eight..."
Despite her deep seeded adoration for dancing, Aiden was extremely grateful when the number ended. First of all, six people was not a large enough group for her to feel comfortable in while fellow dancers watched. Second of all, she was downright exhausted, malnourished, and hungover. She'd only come to class because she was an absence away from failure and getting kicked out of this program was the last thing she needed right now.
"Good! Ok, cool off and gather around my little lambs, it's time for the list!" Todrick sang, using a towel to wipe his own forehead and moving to turn down the music. "Under classmen, you are dismissed for the night, thank you for your work!" He added blowing a kiss in the general direction of a few freshmen. There was an uproar of excited chatter as people gathered their things to either leave or move closer to Todrick. Aiden took her time. She didn't want to hear where she'd been placed because she knew she wasn't going to go so whoever she was with, she'd be letting down.
"Aiden, Honey I know you can move that little butt faster." Todrick called and Aiden shot him a look as she wandered over to join the remaining students. She sat an awkward distance from a couple of them. Aiden hardly ever spoke to her classmates, despite seeing them most days for quite a long time now. She'd deliberately alienated herself from them. Having to dance in front of them was vulnerable enough by itself without Aiden having to try and make friends.
"Ok ladies and bitches lets get right down and dirty." Todrick lifted up a clipboard quite dramatically while several students cat called and cheered his words. "We are doing eight of the ten we rehearsed. First up is the group contemporary..."
Aiden heard her name and she was already on reason number thirty seven why she couldn't do the recital in her head. The group contemporary had a built in solo for each person. There was no way Aiden would ever perform a solo at a recital anymore. The idea made her queasy...or maybe that was just the hangover. Todrick went on to name all eight pieces. Aiden was supposed to be in five of the eight. That was outrageous. No one else was in that many. Aiden felt herself prickle and while everyone else cheerily went on their way after Todrick had finished, Aiden's annoyance got the better of her and bid her stay.
"Five?" Aiden edged, standing and approaching her instructor. Todrick turned around and feigned shock. "Oh my, are you talking to me? Am I to understand you plan on actually attending this performance?" Todrick responded with a fair amount of salt. Aiden huffed, but couldn't hide a bit of embarrassment. "No one else has to do five is all I'm saying." She added, bitterly, already looking like she was ready to leave. "Everyone else would kill to do five." Todrink shot back. Aiden rolled her eyes and turned to leave. What did it matter? She wasn't going to go anyway.
"Ooooh nononononono" Todrick followed after her. He'd never done that before. Aiden had always thought him beyond caring whether she tried or not. "You aren't walking away this time, my little Mumble" He scolded. "I have given you free pass after free pass." He stormed, crossing in front of her and waving a hand in her face. For years, you barely participate in class, you won't perform, your juries are pathetic, you missed the last mandatory recital and I get the feeling you're going to be 'sick' for this one too" Todrick shook his head "The only reason I haven't kicked you right out of my program is because your father is a snack and your mother scares me, but I can't do it anymore!" He threw his arms up and sighed loudly. "I want to believe you have more in you than you give me and it doesn't make any sense that you'd keep coming to class after all this time if you didn't care a little." He paused, looking her up and down, judging her appearance. "Look, I don't know what kind of crazy shit you've got going on up here" He circled a finger around her head "But I've got a whole flock of talented dancers to worry about besides you, so either dance in this recital or your out." He pushed his thumb toward the door. "-What? but I-" Aiden interjected "Nooononono shhh" Todrick pressed a finger against her lips. Aiden shoved it away. "Fine!" She spat "But you can't make me do five, that's ridiculous! Let me drop the solo." Aiden pushed, a little desperately. Todrick could sense it and softened just slightly. "Fine...but then you have to take ballroom and musical theater instead of tap and ballet." "Musical theater with BJ?" Aiden wrinkled her nose. The musical theater piece was certainly outside her comfort zone, especially with BJ. Then again, she'd do anything to get out of the ponite routine.
Anger, fear, and a million other things boiling up inside her, Aiden didn't want to be there anymore. "Fine!" She agreed when Todrick didn't respond. Her face was a little red and she dropped her eyes to the ground. Todrick was too pleased to notice. "Hooray!" He cheered, planting a kiss on her cheek whether she wanted it or not. Aiden was too busy holding herself together to resist. With another wave of his hand, Todrick headed for the door. "Tell your daddy hello from me" He said "The things I would do if that man wasn't straight..." He trailed off as the door closed behind him.
Trembling and dazed Aiden's thoughts were left racing and her heart pounding. How was she going to do this? Was Todrick going to invite her parents? If she bailed and got kicked out of the program she'd let them down and if she danced and wasn't good enough she'd let them down. They must think she'd be doing so much better than she was by now. She hadn't wholly forgiven them for not telling her about the baby, but her rage did not quell the dizzying despair that came upon her when she thought of disappointing them. She'd already screamed at them the last time she saw them, how could she put them through this recital now? She felt like she was on rough seas, her body pitching and turning with each new fear that rose to the the surface until she couldn't possibly take anymore. She sprinted to the trash bin in the corner and vomited.
At this point in the year all the upper classmen will have learned each piece going into the performance and then Todrick, their instructor, will assign who goes where. Today, in fact, was the day. Not everyone in the room was old enough to participate, they would be performing in a less formal setting for grades. This was the second recital Aiden was qualified to participate in. However, she had seen to it that she had been "sick" for the first one. She was planning on being sick for this one too, only in her current state of turmoil it would be far closer to the truth than last time.
She was currently on the floor with five other students finishing up a contemporary piece to the sound of Todrick clapping to the beat and shouting things like: "One, two, three, break and turn and six, seven, KYLE! Step step, leeean, Carly watch your spacing, girl! Here it comes! Knife to the heart, Aiden more sad, less anger! Six, seven, eight..."
Despite her deep seeded adoration for dancing, Aiden was extremely grateful when the number ended. First of all, six people was not a large enough group for her to feel comfortable in while fellow dancers watched. Second of all, she was downright exhausted, malnourished, and hungover. She'd only come to class because she was an absence away from failure and getting kicked out of this program was the last thing she needed right now.
"Good! Ok, cool off and gather around my little lambs, it's time for the list!" Todrick sang, using a towel to wipe his own forehead and moving to turn down the music. "Under classmen, you are dismissed for the night, thank you for your work!" He added blowing a kiss in the general direction of a few freshmen. There was an uproar of excited chatter as people gathered their things to either leave or move closer to Todrick. Aiden took her time. She didn't want to hear where she'd been placed because she knew she wasn't going to go so whoever she was with, she'd be letting down.
"Aiden, Honey I know you can move that little butt faster." Todrick called and Aiden shot him a look as she wandered over to join the remaining students. She sat an awkward distance from a couple of them. Aiden hardly ever spoke to her classmates, despite seeing them most days for quite a long time now. She'd deliberately alienated herself from them. Having to dance in front of them was vulnerable enough by itself without Aiden having to try and make friends.
"Ok ladies and bitches lets get right down and dirty." Todrick lifted up a clipboard quite dramatically while several students cat called and cheered his words. "We are doing eight of the ten we rehearsed. First up is the group contemporary..."
Aiden heard her name and she was already on reason number thirty seven why she couldn't do the recital in her head. The group contemporary had a built in solo for each person. There was no way Aiden would ever perform a solo at a recital anymore. The idea made her queasy...or maybe that was just the hangover. Todrick went on to name all eight pieces. Aiden was supposed to be in five of the eight. That was outrageous. No one else was in that many. Aiden felt herself prickle and while everyone else cheerily went on their way after Todrick had finished, Aiden's annoyance got the better of her and bid her stay.
"Five?" Aiden edged, standing and approaching her instructor. Todrick turned around and feigned shock. "Oh my, are you talking to me? Am I to understand you plan on actually attending this performance?" Todrick responded with a fair amount of salt. Aiden huffed, but couldn't hide a bit of embarrassment. "No one else has to do five is all I'm saying." She added, bitterly, already looking like she was ready to leave. "Everyone else would kill to do five." Todrink shot back. Aiden rolled her eyes and turned to leave. What did it matter? She wasn't going to go anyway.
"Ooooh nononononono" Todrick followed after her. He'd never done that before. Aiden had always thought him beyond caring whether she tried or not. "You aren't walking away this time, my little Mumble" He scolded. "I have given you free pass after free pass." He stormed, crossing in front of her and waving a hand in her face. For years, you barely participate in class, you won't perform, your juries are pathetic, you missed the last mandatory recital and I get the feeling you're going to be 'sick' for this one too" Todrick shook his head "The only reason I haven't kicked you right out of my program is because your father is a snack and your mother scares me, but I can't do it anymore!" He threw his arms up and sighed loudly. "I want to believe you have more in you than you give me and it doesn't make any sense that you'd keep coming to class after all this time if you didn't care a little." He paused, looking her up and down, judging her appearance. "Look, I don't know what kind of crazy shit you've got going on up here" He circled a finger around her head "But I've got a whole flock of talented dancers to worry about besides you, so either dance in this recital or your out." He pushed his thumb toward the door. "-What? but I-" Aiden interjected "Nooononono shhh" Todrick pressed a finger against her lips. Aiden shoved it away. "Fine!" She spat "But you can't make me do five, that's ridiculous! Let me drop the solo." Aiden pushed, a little desperately. Todrick could sense it and softened just slightly. "Fine...but then you have to take ballroom and musical theater instead of tap and ballet." "Musical theater with BJ?" Aiden wrinkled her nose. The musical theater piece was certainly outside her comfort zone, especially with BJ. Then again, she'd do anything to get out of the ponite routine.
Anger, fear, and a million other things boiling up inside her, Aiden didn't want to be there anymore. "Fine!" She agreed when Todrick didn't respond. Her face was a little red and she dropped her eyes to the ground. Todrick was too pleased to notice. "Hooray!" He cheered, planting a kiss on her cheek whether she wanted it or not. Aiden was too busy holding herself together to resist. With another wave of his hand, Todrick headed for the door. "Tell your daddy hello from me" He said "The things I would do if that man wasn't straight..." He trailed off as the door closed behind him.
Trembling and dazed Aiden's thoughts were left racing and her heart pounding. How was she going to do this? Was Todrick going to invite her parents? If she bailed and got kicked out of the program she'd let them down and if she danced and wasn't good enough she'd let them down. They must think she'd be doing so much better than she was by now. She hadn't wholly forgiven them for not telling her about the baby, but her rage did not quell the dizzying despair that came upon her when she thought of disappointing them. She'd already screamed at them the last time she saw them, how could she put them through this recital now? She felt like she was on rough seas, her body pitching and turning with each new fear that rose to the the surface until she couldn't possibly take anymore. She sprinted to the trash bin in the corner and vomited.
