Someone's Gotta Tell Him (Olaf)

[Kristoff]

Kristoff had gone somewhere that he knew would make him feel better. However, on seeing the stables, seeing how overgrown and empty they were…well…it had just made him kind of sad and once again he had that urge to go home. He knew what it was, he knew exactly what it was that was calling him home. Sven. His buddy. Sven whom he had grown up with, Sven that always had his back, Sven whom he could spend hours talking too…Sven…



With a sigh he stepped forward and started clearing off some of the hay that had taken hold of what appeared to be a once well maintained stable.
Someone else must have started the work, so there was not too much left to do, it was just...he needed something to do right now...something that would stop him thinking about Anna, and about the hard decision he had to make there...and Sven...


After a little while he heard footsteps behind, grabbing the shovel he had retrieved earlier with Elsa he turned around and said, “Who’s there?!”

[Olaf]

This strange new place was definitely nothing like Arendelle. On heading out of the forest, Olaf had found a path and followed it, and seeing the tops of a castle ahead he had decided to head in that direction, figuring that was probably where Elsa and the others had gone. After all, Elsa was a queen and Anna a princess, and where else would you look for a queen and a princess other than in a castle? It just made sense.

He hadn’t been able to shift a strange sense of unease though, something he hadn’t never felt before and couldn’t understand at all. He assumed it was because he didn’t know where his friends were, and he was worried about Sven back in Arendelle. He supposed that since Elsa and Anna and Kristoff and he were all in this new world, that meant Sven was in charge of the kingdom. He couldn’t think who else it would be. He only hoped that there was someone there who could understand him as well as well as Kristoff, or Sven would be in for a pretty frustrating time.

Reaching a building, Olaf decided he needed a break - he had walked a long way, and this whole ‘pain’ thing was now spreading to his feet. He missed his snow, snow didn’t hurt. He decided to rest, and as he moved towards the building he heard someone moving around inside. His excitement rose - another new friend! - and he hurried towards the door.

He let out an exclamation of delight as he saw Kristoff, shovel in hand, and threw himself towards his friend, enveloping him in a bear hug. “Kristoff! Oh my goodness, I’ve been so worried about you! Now don’t worry, I left Sven in charge of Arendelle, and while I think it will be a challenge for him, I think he has excellent potential and will do a truly inspiring job.” He paused for breath. “So, what’s new with you?”

[Kristoff]

Kristoff stood and stared in shock at the new arrival.

What the fjord was happening?

Who was this strange fat man coming towards him so excitedly? How did he know Sven? Was he from Arendelle? Why would Sven be in charge of Arendelle? Why was this strange fat excitable talkative man worried about him?! And whilst yes, absolutely Sven would do a truly inspiring job of running a country how did this man know that?! You know, the way he spoke, his whole general demeanour, it just kind of reminded him of…oh no…oooooh…noooo…

Kristoff took a step back and said, “………Olaf?”

[Olaf]

"Yes! It's me! Don't I look fabulous!" Olaf spun in a little circle for Kristoff, to show off his new appearance. "Turns out I make a truly spectacular human."

He grabbed Kristoff's hands and jumped on the spot, forcing Kristoff to jump with him. "Isn't this the best day ever? I followed you all through that big magic swirly thing and now I'm a person! I don't need a flurry! I have toes!"

He released Kristoff's hands and dropped to the floor, pulling off his shoe and sock and sticking his foot in Kristoff's face. "See?!"

[Kristoff]

“Yes…truly…spectacular,” said Kristoff, still staring at the non-snowman in wonder.

It was strange, this should be normal, walking talking snowmen were not normal, but human people they were normal, so why was it so strange that he was human now? Life used to be so much simpler before that damned redhead came into his life, it used to just be ice, sleds and Sven. Now there were crazy worried ice powered sisters and talking snowmen now not a snowmen.

He missed his ice.

And his sleigh.

“Don’t, don’t do that,” said Kristoff, knowing that it would take more than that to stop the snowman holding his hand.

Then of course he was sitting on the ground and taking his shoes off, “Olaf no! No keep them on. They’re good toes, just…put them away…wait, you followed us here?...does Elsa know?”

[Olaf]

He obligingly pulled his sock and shoe back on at Kristoff's request. He wondered if Kristoff had a thing about feet - he wouldn't be surprised, he spent most of his time with Sven and troll people who didn't have feet, so Olaf could understand if he found them a bit weird. Olaf had only had feet for a few hours, and although he found them absolutely fascinating, and the ways toes wiggled was hilarious, he could see why they might make people uncomfortable.

He pushed himself back to his feet again, nodding at Kristoff's first question before quickly changing to motion to a shake at the second question "I couldn't let you all go without me, you never know when you might need the help of your favourite snowman. Or... person-man. Fleshman? Oo that one sounds scary..." Olaf shuddered. "Anyway, I thought you might need my help so I jumped in and followed you. It took ages to find you - why aren't you together? Did you find Anna yet? I made a new friend in the woods, she's pale and pretty and she has another friend and he's going to be my friend too." Olaf was getting excited again.

"I haven't found Elsa yet - but I bet she'll be so super happy to see me! Won't she? Just like you - aren't you just the happiest you've ever been to see me here!"

[Kristoff]

“Person is fine, please, please don’t say fleshman again,” said Kristoff, only looking slightly horrified, “it must be this place, I think there might be magic in it, or at least El-…her majesty thinks there might be. It must have turned you into a flesh-…a person.”

He felt a pang in his chest and said, “Uh…no, no I haven’t found Anna yet. It’s fine, her majesty will find her and, you know, probably best to let the two of them catch up for a bit first…you know how El-…her majesty can get.”

He couldn’t help it, he smiled a little and said, “Yeah…it’s good to see you Olaf. Just…no more taking your shoes off for now ok? Don’t know what you might stand on.”

[Olaf]

Olaf looked confused for a second, unsure who Kristoff was talking about. “Who’s Ellamajsty? Is she a new friend you made?” His confusion immediately changed to a look of excitement. “Oooo do you think she’ll be my friend too? This place is great for making new friends. Who would have thought that an abandoned scary overgrown castle could have so many people in it, just waiting to be my friend? You’d have think they’d have cleared things up a bit...”

For all his exuberance and seeming inability to stop talking, it could never be said that Olaf didn’t care about his friends, and he noticed the slight change in Kristoff’s expression when he said he hadn’t found Anna yet. He stepped forward, expecting to be as tall as Kristoff’s knee and having to hug his leg for comfort, and was pleasantly surprised when he realised he was a flesh-man now, and was tall enough to put his arm around Kristoff’s shoulder. “She’ll be ok. I know it. She’s Anna!” He said with a reassuring smile.

He stepped back and put one hand on his heart and one in the air. “I promise I will never ever take my shoes off again. These shoes will stay on my feet forever and ever, no matter how smelly and dirty and yucky they get. I promise.”

[Kristoff]

“No, Ellamajsty is not-look…it’s Elsa, I meant Elsa, only she’s a queen so you’re supposed to call her your majesty but I…keep forgetting,” said Kritoff eventually.

He really needed to get a grip on that, they were royalty and he was nothing more than a peasant. He wondered if snowmen would have to adhere to the courtly niceties. Was there even any kind of royal protocol for that? Would they have to make one up? Elsa basically made Olaf so she was kind of like his mum so did that make him a Prince? Wait…was he talking to Prince Olaf….was OLAF going to inherit the kingdom?!

A look of fear crossed his face and then he told himself that these were not the kind of thoughts to be having right now. He smiled when Olaf said that they will find Anna, “Well I found her in a snowstorm…how hard could it be to find her in a school?”

Kristoff rolled his eyes and said, “No, no you can still take your shoes off just…not…in front of other people, like, at home…where no one can see.”

[Olaf]

"Ohh, so is Ellamajsty your new nickname for her? That's awesome, friends give each other nicknames so you two must be really good friends! I don't think I have a nickname - do you have a nickname? Maybe we could give each other nicknames..." Olaf thought for a moment. "Like you could be... K-man! Yeah, I'm going to call you K-man from now on. Cos that's what friends do." He grinned at Kristoff.

"I don't know," Olaf said thoughtfully, "Schools have more rooms than snowstorms."

It was amazing really, for someone with such a small brain, Olaf amazed himself at how deep and clever he could be sometimes.

[Kristoff]

“NO!” said Kristoff in a panic, “that is not a new nickname for her, please do not call her that, and please do not tell her that I called her that. I do not want to be an ice sculpture.”

He scrunched up his nose in disgust when Olaf called him ‘K-man’ and said, “Fine then, I’m going to call you…O….O…uh…Ooooooooolaf….yeah.”

The snowman actually had a point, which was worrying, it was always worrying when snowmen had points, mostly on account of the fact that they were made of snow and probably shouldn’t have points. However this particular snowman was now human and so he supposed that meant that he could have a point. Schools did have a lot of rooms.

“Well…I’ll search every room until I find her,” he said firmly, knowing that he meant it.

[Olaf]

"Maybe she'll make you a snowman instead of a sculpture." Olaf said thoughtfully. "That's way better, and she can give you a flurry and you'll have a carrot nose and..." Realisation suddenly hit. "Oohh, wait - you mean she'll be angry. Don't worry, I'll protect you! I can do that now I'm a flesh-man." He grinned proudly.

He raised an eyebrow as K-Man came up with his new nickname, before folding his arms and shaking his head. "Poor effort, K-Man. I'll give you some time to think of something better. It's ok, not everyone is as good at this as me."

He grinned again, bouncing once more, as K-man told him his plan. "That sounds like a fantastic idea! I can help! We can look in every single room and then we'll find her and you'll be reunited and everyone will cry and you'll kiss and you'll live happily ever after." He nodded. "It's perfect, we should go!"

[Kristoff]

“I…I don’t think I would make a very good snowman,” said Kristoff, at a loss for anything else to say, “and besides…that’s you’re thing. Well, back in home at least. And please, please stop saying flesh-man.”

He couldn’t believe this, he was being patronised…by a snowman, “I can think of a better one than that, I can do right now,” he said firmly, “from now on you are…Laffy…yeah…laffy…cause you know it’s part of your name and…and….you laugh a lot. Yeah.”

He felt pleased with the name until Olaf started talking about how when they found Anna they would kiss and have a happy ending…the smile disappeared and he went back to his usual grumpy face, “Olaf that’s…that’s not…I just want to find her to make sure she’s safe and then…then I’m going home.”

He stuck his hands in his pockets and grumbled, “that ice isn’t going to deliver itself after all.”

[Olaf]

"Being a snowman is easy." Olaf said with a grin. "As long as you have your own flurry you just have be super happy and fun and give good hugs and try not to let your legs wander off without you. There's nothing to it!"

Olaf laughed loudly at Kristoff's nickname for him. "Laffy. I like it! I'm going to tell everyone to call me Laffy from now on." He grinned at Kristoff. "Hello, my name is Laffy and I like warm hugs! It's brilliant."

His smile faded when he saw Kristoff's grumpy face reappear and he frowned, imitating K-man's expression. "K-man, don't be grumpy. You can't go home yet! Someone else can deliver the ice for a while, you have to stay here with me and explore! Think of all the adventure's we'll have! And when we find Anna she can come on the adventures too and you and Anna can go on romantic dates and kiss and she can be your girlfriend and you'll live happily ever after!" He looked at Kristoff seriously. "You do want her to be your girlfriend, don't you?"

[Kristoff]

He had to admit it; it did actually make him kind of happy to think that Olaf liked the nickname. Kristoff wasn’t very good at being whimsical, or at least that’s what he thought, doing Sven’s voice in his eyes wasn’t whimsical, that was just something he had always done. So it was good to know that he still had it within him to make someone else happy.

He frowned even more when Olaf mimicked him, but tried to keep his mouth shut. There was no point saying anything to the snowman, he would only go and blurt it out to anyone that was listening and he really did not want this getting back to Anna…or worse…Elsa…

However then he asked the question and he couldn’t keep it in anymore.

“Of course I do!” he said loudly, “of course…I…I want to go on romantic dates and eat chocolate and listen to her prattle on about her favourite sandwich, and be there for her when she falls which is surprisingly a lot, but…but she’s a Princess…she is Princess Anna. And I’m…just the guy who delivers the ice. Which…when you have a Queen that could probably do that all on her own…seems a little superfluous. ”

Turning away from the snowman he said, “So…yes, but I can’t. Princesses, don’t marry ice deliverers.”