A Meeting Well Over Due {Arthur}

[Cazaril]

Well, this was certainly over due. The last time he'd seen Arthur his memory was so fuzzy. Just like with Morgana, with Merlin. He remembered them, remembered their lives, how they met, but how they parted, how he was ripped away. 

It was like a mist. Perhaps it was part of the portal's doing, or whatever had made him young again had made it difficult to retain memories, but whatever it was, it was frustrating. 

So it was time to get the story straight. 

Cazaril, slightly apprehensive, knocked on the door to Arthur's homestead. Aware that he was expected, but still aware that this might not be as easy a reunion as he would like. 

After all, Arthur had grown this time, into a man, a king, a father. Cazaril only looked slightly older, beard and all and the lifestyle of which he'd kept. In fact, As of this year, he'd be the same age he'd been when he had first appeared In Camelot all those years ago...

And things had certainly changed since then. 

[Arthur]

There was a knock on the door. Arthur had been inside checking the interior of the place, taking note of any damage that had been caused by the plants that seemed to have invaded the place. Thankfully, most of his old DVD collection appeared to be intact, that was definitely a bonus, and he noticed that a little protective vine case was around Merlin’s books that he had left there. Must be a magic thing.

Standing up he crossed over to the door and opened it.

When he saw the other man standing there he dropped the DVD that had been in his hand and stared. Then he smiled. Then he lunged forward and threw his arms around the man, “CAZ!”

He hugged him tightly before stepping back to look at him again, “how are you?! Where have you been?!”

There was so much joy at seeing him again, coursing through him, however it was slowly being overshadowed by something else, something darker, something that had been haunting them for the past ten years. ‘How do I tell him?’ he thought, ‘How do I tell him what Morgana has become.’

[Cazaril]

It was always a joy to be greeted by Arthur Pendragon. How could he not smile at such an excited response to his presence on the door step. He laughs, a proper belly full laugh as the pair embrace. It's almost like when Arthur was a kid again. How long ago that felt.

"I --- well, Chalion still hadn't gotten into war when I was sent back, to that was good..." He looked the young man over. Unable to help the smile on his own features.

He had so much to ask, so much to say, but at the end of it all, he just didn't know where to start, instead, swallowing he put a hand on Arthur's shoulder before stepping through into the house.

"It's so good to see you, your Highness. Ten years is far too long to stay away from friends."

[Arthur]

“It is wonderful to see you too,” said Arthur genuinely, “ten years is indeed too long, although I am pleased that all is well in your lands. You will be pleased to hear that things are equally as well in Camelot.”

‘Except the fact that we still cannot find my sister and the mother of your child…’

“Please, come in,” said Arthur holding the door open so the older man could come through, “I would offer you some tea or something stronger, but I’m afraid much of the food that was left over the frat house even before we got pulled back to our home worlds was out of date.”

Walking into the house, motioning for Caz to go ahead of him he smiled a little sadly and said, “And…it’s ‘your majesty’ now…my…my father passed away…about 8 years ago now…however, we have ever been good friends so Arthur will be just fine when it comes to you.”

[Cazaril]

Cazaril was pleased to see Arthur so adjusted, perhaps that was just due to age, or because he had become King that this had seemed apparent in this moment. That, or there was no one else here for the man to impress. Still, as he walked through he shook his head at the thought of anything to drink.

"I'm fine, Arthur, really..."

He swallowed a little, remembering Uther. He would not mourn that man privately, but for Arthur, he would be appropriate. He may have not been a good man, or a good king, but he had been Arthur's father. He squeezes his shoulder.

"I am sorry about that. I am glad you consider me a friend. I am afraid, my memory is blank after....before the portal, everything is a blur, like a dream in snap shots...I do not know what happened to anyone after I was sent back into the portal."

It was coded of course. What happened to you? What happened to your family, what happened to mine...

[Arthur]

He doesn’t know. He doesn’t remember.

Arthur motioned to the chairs where the two of them could sit and waited until the man had sat down before he spoke again. He needed to choose his words carefully, to find the best possible way to tell this man. He took a seat in one of the armchairs and took a breath.

“Well…a lot has happened…I…I’m suffering from a little amnesia myself,” said Arthur, “the first few months after I got back…something during the war made me different, made me…the worst version of myself is probably the best way to describe it.”

‘A mindless killing machine’ would be another but these were details that he felt he could spare the man.

“They brought me back though, eventually,” he said with a smile.

He couldn’t do this, he couldn’t tell him, “How is Challion? Is everything well there?”

[Cazaril]

"I've been quite a few wars Arthur, I can understand that...that way of working....and I'm sure your memory will recover, mine did, eventually...still getting there."

He sits opposing him, and he can see it, he can see it in the way he sits. He sees it in the way he smiles, it's not full or bright. It might be age. It might be something else, but Cazaril knows.

He knows this is going to hurt.

"Chalion hasn't changed much, the same as it always was...at least it didn't get back to war. I took care of myself, searching for portals mainly..." He takes a breath himself. He could feel the chill on his neck.

"Arthur, I'm sorry to be blunt. I...what happened to my family, what happened to Morgana?" He hates for it to feel like a demand, "I just want to know."

[Arthur]

He wanted to tell Cazaril the truth, that the reason he had no memory, the reason he had become the worst version of himself was due to a curse, however all of that was so wrapped up in what had happened to Morgana and he wasn’t ready to tell the man that yet. Not yet, just let him live in ignorance a little longer.

Of course…then he asked…and there was no escape.

Arthur looked down at his hands in front of him, unable to meet his gaze. “I don’t know,” he whispered, “I…I don’t know where she is right now.”

He looked up at Cazaril, “she…changed…when we returned to Camelot she…I was under the effects of a curse that had been placed on me during the war, on our return…we did…we did terrible things. The only difference was that I was cursed…she…she was just her…Caz I’m sorry I…when father found out he had her imprisoned, he was going to execute her. I was going to break her out before they could but when I got there…her cell was empty…I haven’t seen her since…I’m…I’m sorry Caz…I wish…I wish I could tell you something else…”

[Cazaril]

He had suspected something had happened. It wasn't entirely obvious, but there were clues in the way people were looking at him, the way people seemed hesitant.

Sadly, his fears were exactly what was offered to him on a king size plate. He could feel his stomach fall away, as he tried, desperately to take the news with some sense of pride. But Arthur's sorrow made it worse. He takes a breath, puts his own thoughts on the problem aside, and takes the Kings hands with a squeeze.

"I am sure, in the circumstances you did what was necessary Arthur, as King you must protect your Kingdom. I understand that...believe me."

But even saying it, even as he hears his own words, his voice feels tighter, a struggle to get out.

He might not be able to save Morgana but...

"And what of Mordred? Was...was he with her?"

[Arthur]

Relief washed over him at Caz’s response, but then again, why had he presumed the worst? He had expected Caz to rage, to demand why he hadn’t done more to stop her, or worse ask why he didn’t just give her what she wanted. However Caz was ever reasonable, he was a good man, and offering understanding in moments like these was just how he was. Arthur hoped then when he reached the age that Caz did that he might one day be able to offer the same.

The relief he felt from Caz’s response was short lived as he then asked his next question. Morderd.

Arthur looked up at him and slowly shook his head, “I…I don’t know,” he said quietly, “we looked for him, we looked for both of them but…we couldn’t find him…Caz…don’t worry…he’ll be ok. For all of Morgana’s faults she loved that child, she would never do anything to hurt Mordred.”

[Cazaril]

Cazaril just nods. No news was good news, wasn't it? Wasn't that a good thing? Cazaril took in a breath, putting a hand through his hair.

"Yes, yes you're right. She wouldn't hurt our boy....I'd hope for that anyway..." he says, quietly, before meeting the younger man's eyes. It's horrid, to know that two people you love are at odds, that you must take sides.

"Do you think she can be saved Arthur? Do....do you think she could ever be good again?"

It's a silly question, they both know the answer. He just wishes he could do something, anything but this hopeless, powerless issue.

"I'm sorry to put this burden on you Arthur, you know I wouldn't ask if I could ask someone else..."

[Arthur]

Arthur reached forward and placed a hand on the older man’s shoulder, looking in to his eyes.

“I have always believed that she can be saved,” said Arthur firmly, “and so long as their breathe in me I will continue to believe that. I remember Morgana when she was younger, when we were children, I know the person she used to be, and yes, people change…but that doesn’t mean that they cannot change again.”

He knew that his opinion was in the minority, he knew that many of the others still believed that she was beyond saving, that the darkness had consumed her completely. However he had to believe that wasn’t the case, that as dark as her heart had become there was still hope. He would always hold on to that hope. If only they knew were Mordred was…then maybe they could help her…maybe then they could make her see.

“I gladly shoulder this burden Caz, because it is not one,” said Arthur smiling sadly at him, “I want to help her, I want to help Mordred and I want to help you. Not because I am a king and it is my duty to help my subjects, but because you are family.”

[Cazaril]

The hand on his shoulder is a comfort that he hadn't realised he needed, looking to the young king in front of him, Cazaril put a hand above the own and gave it a squeeze.

"I may not have seen you in action, but I know that you must be a fine king, Arthur. I'm very proud of you. Not because of this....but it does give me some comfort."

Still, as took a breath he considered what that meant. His lover and his child were still lost to him, after all this time of wishing and searching. Perhaps one day he'll find her again, he'll hope that his boy is also safe, and they can work together to give Morgana peace, and Camelot remain peaceful too.

After all, Cazaril was important to both parties, surely....with his help, he could bring the woman who loved him back.

"And now you have a boy of your own, so I hear. I haven't been fortunate enough to meet him yet, but the stories do you some credit."

[Arthur]

Arthur and smiled, “I just try to do the best that I can for the people. I know I am never going to be the perfect king but I can damn well try.”

It was something that kept him up at night, frequently, worrying if he really was helping the people of his country or just making them more miserable. He relied on his advisors, lords and knights to bring back news of what the people were thinking, how they were, but sometimes he wondered if they sugar coated it, if really they were suffering. That was why he tried to go out himself sometimes, to see it with his own eyes, to hear it himself. Merlin and Gwen probably thought he was just being vain but he wasn’t, he was just worried that he wasn’t doing a good enough job.

He could not help the smile that graced his face when Caz brought up Tirstian, “I could not have asked for a better son. He is…everything to me. He’s already a great little fighter, quick and sharp, you would be impressed Caz, I am passing on everything you taught me. Although I have a horrible feeling that Gawain and Lancelot might be passing on other bad habits to him as well, like hot to sneak out the castle, or get cake from the cook…not that I ever did any of that…as far as Tristian is concerned.”