I Don't Shine if You Don't Shine (Arkady)

[Dusty Fae]

Dusty’d had a lot ta think about since she’d run into Nikolay the other day. There were lots o’ things he’d said that made ‘er stop and think for a minute. She weren’t too sure what to believe. She hadn’t known Arkady too long, but she thought she knew ‘im well enough ta know what kinda person he was. He didn’t seem to be the kinda person that Nikolay were sayin’, at least to her.

She were just confused. Just plain ol’ confused. She didn’t want ta believe Nikolay. He seemed real nice and all, but he and Arkady were brothers. Maybe brothers knew more about each other than a girlfriend did. Then again, they might not. Dusty weren’t sure. She didn’t have any brothers or sisters to compare it to. But if Nikolay were wrong, then how come Arkady’d never brought up his family before? He’d never even mentioned that he had a brother or a sister.

She needed to give him a chance to explain though. That were only fair. And in the meantime she were gonna go for a short walk, just so she could stop thinkin’ ‘bout all the confusin’ stuff.

Dusty opened the door, all ready to go for her walk, but someone standin’ at the door took ‘er by surprise. “Oh,” she said, surprised. But she smiled, realizin’ it were only Arkady. “Arkady, yah scared me. I weren’t expectin’ you.” Then she noticed that his clothes were diff’rent. And his hair a bit different too. “You look real nice. They look new.”

[Deleted]

Sauntering across the campus, Arkady felt like a thousand bucks. People always said ‘clothes make the man’, and he was starting to believe there was some truth to that statement. He didn’t believe it completely, mind you, because there were some pretty useless people in the world that dressed well, but he certainly felt like he was on his way up in the world after his little makeover from Tristian. It wasn’t just the clothes, though; the prince was also helping with his reputation and mannerisms. Soon he would truly be worthy of the royal blood in his veins.

Slipping into the girl’s dorms had been easy, security was never very strong in the daylight hours, and the half smile never left Arkady’s face until he reached Dusty’s room. He had opted for dark blue jeans and a midnight blue blazer over a white button up shirt, still untucked to give it a bit of a careless look. He’d even worn the shiny new black shoes and brushed his hair back just to have the whole effect. Actually looking forward to Dusty’s reaction, he smoothed his blazer and raised his hand to knock just as the door opened in front of him. Startled, he took a step back and slowly lowered his hand.

“I wasn’t expecting you to answer before I even knocked either,” he said, returning the smile. He watched her eyes move over him as she took in the new look, though he had expected a little more appreciation. Or perhaps ‘hoped’ was a better word.

“Thought it was time for a change. You know, looking toward the future and all.”

[Dusty Fae]

“Do you wanna come in?” she asked, openin’ the door wider to let him in. He’d come to see ‘er so he probably wanted to talk or somethin’. Although he mighta just come to show off his new clothes. Dusty weren’t real sure what to make of the new clothes. They looked a lot more expensive than his other clothes. They looked real nice and all, but Dusty weren’t sure what to think ‘bout ‘em. Back home yah didn’t just up and buy a new wardrobe. Most folks didn’t have the kinda money it took to do that. Those that did flaunted it from the beginning. It seemed kinda outta place for Arkady to suddenly have such nice expensive clothes.

And she really didn’t know what he meant when he said he were lookin’ towards the future. She creased her brow tryin’ ta work it all out. “What kind o’ future?” she asked. He’d never mentioned anythin’ ‘bout the future to her before. She were kinda curious what he meant by that.

[Deleted]

“Sure. Thanks, babe,” Arkady replied. Taking a step forward, he paused to give Dusty a peck on the cheek before stepping into the room. Inconspicuously taking a look around as he walked in, he turned around once he was about centre and stuff his hands into the front pockets of his jeans. He was pleased to note that there didn’t appear to be any annoying roommates lingering about.

“I dunno,” he said with a shrug, and it was an honest answer. Since his outing with Tristian he had actually been thinking about his future more, not in the way he used to where he’d dwell on what it should be but never could, but in a more realistic way. Maybe he could never claim his rightful crown, but he didn’t have to be a pauper forever either. “Just been thinking. It won’t be long before we have to start deciding on what to take at University, and I guess I’ve decided that... well, that I do want to go.”

He shrugged again. It was strange, he was uncomfortable talking about this, yet part of him actually wanted to discuss it with her. “That’s about as far as I’ve gotten.”

[Dusty Fae]

Dusty were awful glad that her part o’ the room were tidy. Honest though, she didn’t have much in the room to make it untidy. And she’d always made her bed ever’ day. It was a rule back home and by now it were just habit. “You can sit,” she offered. She pointed to her bed, which had a small wooden truck at the end of it where she kept most of her things for home that she wouldn’t need here. “There’s the bed, or the truck or the chair.” She pointed to her desk and chair. She only wanted ta be hospitable.

Talkin’ ‘bout the future was kinda strange since Dusty’d always planned on havin’ one kind of future back she didn’t have too many options. But here, there were lots o’ possibilities. Arkady were even talkin’ like he assumed she’d go to university too, when she’d never much thought about it. “Well, that’s farther’n me. I never really thought about goin’ ta university. Most girls my age back home are done with schoolin’ by now and off gettin’ married.” She frowned thoughtfully. “I guess I ain’t though much ‘bout other possibilities ‘cause I ain’t ever had ‘em afore.”

[Deleted]

As a gentleman, Arkady should probably have chosen the chair, but he knew how uncomfortable those desk chairs were; it was one of his excuses for often not doing his homework. At the very least he should have chosen the trunk, but without giving it any thought he seated himself on the edge of Dusty’s bed, down near the foot of it so there was plenty of room for her to sit beside him. It hadn’t really occurred to him until now that this was the first time he had stepped foot in her room. They always met somewhere, whether it was the movie theatre or the park, or even just the cafeteria for lunch. The layout was the same as his room, but the details were more feminine.

Listening to her explanation, he couldn’t help but frown a little. He had never seen much of a future for himself at home either, dreaming only of the one he had been deprived of and assuming he would end up working in some dirty factory his whole life. Seemed he wasn’t the only one with low expectations.

“But you do have them now,” he pointed out, the slightest smile curving his lips. “One of the beauties of this place, huh? Here you can do anything. The possibilities are endless.”

It was actually a pretty exciting thought. Here he could be anything. He had no responsibilities, no expectations, he could just do whatever he wanted, be whatever he wanted... be whoever he wanted.

[Dusty Fae]

Dusty sat on the bed next to Arkady, thinkin’ ‘bout ever’thin’ they were talkin’ ‘bout. She’d always thought that she’d get married and have a family. She’d be a wife to someone who’d have ‘er. There had to be someone out there that’d take ‘er. A widower maybe who needed a mother for his children. She could do that. She figured she’d be a good mother some day.

But things were diff’rent here. Girls went to school and learned all sorts o’ things. All of a sudden there were lots o’ things she could do or be if’n she wanted to. It were a little frightenin’ really. She’d had one thing in ‘er head now for so long that it were more’n a little overwhelmin’ ta think ‘bout ever’thin’ else she could do. “But how d’ya know what yah really wanna do? How are we supposed to decide? How are we gonna know if it’ll make us happy?” she asked bitin’ ‘er bottom lip.

Dusty didn’t think it were excitin’ atall. The only thing she’d ever been sure about was that someday she’d wanna be married. Now she were tryin’ ta decide if she even wanted ta have a job or career. Did she even want more schoolin’? There was a lot ta think about.

[Deleted]

While Arkady viewed the whole idea as an opportunity, something almost exciting, Dusty looked down right worried just thinking about it. She didn’t seem happy at the thought, nor excited, and he couldn’t help but frown a little at the questions.

“Would you be happy just going back home to the life you had before?” he asked, tilting his head as he looked over at her. “I don’t know what I want to do, nor now to decide, but I do know what I don’t want.”

She had told him once what her mother was. Was that what waited for her back home? A lifetime of selling herself to any man who could afford to pay her? Was she resigned to that? Draping an arm around her shoulder, Arkady tried to smile a little. “Aren’t you a little relieved about having your own choice of what to do with your life instead of just doing what everyone expects you to because they expect it?”

[Dusty Fae]

Dusty has a lotta concerns ‘bout her future. It weren’t an easy decision atall, especially when ya had yer whole life relatively planned out and then ever’thin’ changed. She didn’t want her life to go back to the way it were in Los Avalos. “I s’pose I don’t want what I had back home,” she said, though she weren’t quite sure. She were gonna have to go home sometime and ever’thin’ would be just about the same. Gettin’ an education wouldn’t solve that. Dusty’d accepted that this was the way her life was.

But she did have choices. She didn’t have a lotta choices at home, but she still had some. “I don’t have to be what they expect me to be. I don’t wanna be what they expect o’ me. I just had other plans. And now that I’m here I can do whatever I want.” She sighed and leaned into Arkady. “I just don’t know how.”

[Deleted]

Arkady’s brow furrowed slightly as he listened to Dusty talk. He felt a strange sense of relief when she admitted to to not wanting to be what everyone expected her to be, but he didn’t dwell on it. He just passed it off as believing that nobody should have to live that life if they didn’t want it, and she certainly didn’t seem the type.

“I don’t know how either,” he admitted, leaning his head against hers, “but I figure this is a good way to start.” Change his looks, change himself, and everything else would follow. He could have the life he wanted, the life he deserved; it was just within his grasp so long as he didn’t let himself get distracted.

“Were your other plans good plans?” Arkady asked after a moment, his curiosity getting the better of him. “Being here doesn’t mean they can’t still happen if you still want them to.”

[Dusty Fae]

Dusty were glad that she weren’t the only one who didn’t know what she were s’posed ta be plannin’ for a future. “I think so too,” she agreed. Sometimes a man had ta change how he dressed ta move up in the world sometimes. Maybe a change would help Arkady figure out what he wanted to do.

Telling Arkady about what her plans had been was gonna be a bit strange. The way things worked here were real diff’rent from home. “Well, I thought they were good plans. I had planned on finishin’ school and then gettin’ married.” That felt awful strange ta say, especially to the boy that she were datin’. “I didn’t have anyone in mind, it was just my plan. I wanted to get outta Los Avalos so I could go someplace where people wouldn’t know me and ask about my past. It weren’t like I were in love with someone back home though,” she explained though it still sounded awful. “I’m explainin’ it badly. It sounds all wrong. I’m sorry.” She didn’t know how to explain it any diff’rent though and that were the worst part. Now she were wishin’ she’d never opened ‘er mouth.