Just One Drink {open}

[Judy Hopps]

"whoo!" yelled not-officer Judy Hopps, thrusting her arms into the air. A drink in her left hand sloshed liquid mostly down her arm as she showed off her newly found lung capacity. Judy grinned a wide grin as she scrambled atop a table.

"It's time to cut loose and have fun!" she yelled again. She began doing the whitest of drunk white girl dances, sort of moving in an almost arrhythmic pattern. There might have been some attempts at gyrations. They were not successful attempts. She may have almost fallen off the table. A few times.

Let's rewind a bit.

Judy actually wanted to celebrate. The bonfire had been something she'd been totally a fan of, pushing for it, helping to organize, volunteering to help. But then someone had stated that Judy didn't know how to relax, couldn't let her ears down, as it were. Judy had initially waved it off. But then she'd sort of sat and realized that thus far, she'd been doing nothing but running around and working. Nonstop. Save for the moments when she'd collapsed or shoveled food in her mouth. She hadn't even gotten her phone charged up to listen to music. and when she'd had time off, she'd wandered the halls to memorize them and talked with teachers.

So, really, would one drink really be so bad?

"whoo, give us a show!" yelled some rando, since we have those now.

"You got it!" yelled Judy, reaching down to start trying to pull at her (mostly) buttoned flannel shirt. Fortunately her fingers were fumbling.

so yeah, one drink. On a girl who was about five feet if that and under one hundred pounds.

Whoo indeed.

[Phoebus]

He'd heard about this celebratory bonfire, and had figured it would be a good idea to go along, perhaps meet a few more people, see if any more of his storybook heroes were around. He hadn't met Arthur yet, and he really, really wanted to meet the King. There was a little part of him that had this crazy idea that once Arthur saw how chivalrous and valiant he was, he'd make him one of the famed knights of the round table, and all of Phoebus' dreams would officially come true.

The only bonfires he'd been to before had been, well, witch-burnings, which oddly enough weren't all that much fun. He was pretty confident that this bonfire wouldn't involve screaming and the smell of burning flesh. Which immediately put it a good few steps above the others.

He'd been pleased to see drinks on offer, and he'd wasted no time getting himself an ale. With all the madness of the last few days, he needed to unwind, and ale was a taste of home, a taste of something familiar. It immediately relaxed him, and he found a table and sat down, drinking deeply as he looked around and took everything in.

He heard the shout and looked in the direction that most of the other men around seemed to be looking and cheering, frowning when he saw the spectacle they were cheering on. This didn't look good. The girl had clearly had too much to drink, and - was she trying to get undressed?! Phoebus' innate sense of chivalry and honour immediately took hold, and abandoning his drink, he stood quickly and headed over to the girl, catching her hand as she fumbled with her buttons.

"Excuse me, miss, but it appears you could use a little help." He said with a charming smile, bending and kissing her hand, keeping it firmly in his grip to stop her exposing herself to the audience she was rapidly gathering. "Allow me to escort you to a glass of water."

[Judy Hopps]

Judy's paw stopped moving. Why did her paw stop moving? Judy frowned, staring down at it, trying to figure out what precisely had happened there. Wait, someone was talking. Judy looked up, seeing a blonde hoo-man speaking with her. He was apparently kissing her paw, which struck Judy as a bit gross.

And people were booing him, for some reason? or at least a few people were.

"I usually do the helping," Judy said, nodding. She tilted her head, looking around. "Wasn't I doing something..."

She moved to turn or get up or pivot or possibly break into more dance moves. See, the trick is she barely got started moving when her footpaw slipped. It lurched out from under her and Judy went tumbling down. Fortunately there was someone gripping her hand, which meant she was likely falling in a very specific direction.

[Phoebus]

He had just been about to point out that everyone needed help sometimes, and this appeared to be her moment, when she suddenly lurched away from him. Fortunately, he had hold of her hand, which meant that instead of flying away from him, she fall backwards into him. Now, women swooning was something Phoebus was somewhat used to, and his reflexes immediately kicked in.

As she fell, he caught her, sweeping her up into his arms. He looked at her, this small woman lying in his arms, and smiled charmingly at her. "Well, this is rather forward, but since you're here..." He held her for a few moments, looking for somewhere safe and away from the now booing spectators, and turned towards the table he'd just left.

"We seem to have skipped a few pleasantries," he smiled, still holding her in his arms. "Phoebus de Châteaupers at your service, mademoiselle. Now, how about we find you that glass of water?"

[Judy Hopps]

Judy grinned a sloppy grin as she tapped Phoebus's face, patting him a few times. "Big strong guy, huh?" she said, giggling again. HE was saying something about pleasantries, so Judy focused. That name was a mouthful, and her eyes narrowed. "Phoeb---Pee-bus---Phoebe?" That was a name, right? That made sense. "I guess water wouldn't be so bad."

She shrugged, then seemed to realize that she was in someone's arms. She shifted. "I can walk," she insisted, squirming, trying to get her feet onto the ground. Were Judy in control of her faculties, she probably could've managed. She had enough self-defense training and experience getting out of bigger being's grips that it wouldn't take much for her to do it. Except that she was drunk, a bit delirious on top of that, and now that some of her adrenaline had faded, she felt a little sluggish on top of that.

"Hot," she mumbled, stopping her squirming to start waving her face. "Super hot," she reached down, moving to try and pull her shirt off again. Of course, the buttons were still in the way, so Judy just sort of flipped the hem of her shirt up and down before sort of bunching it.

[Phoebus]

He chuckled at her as she patted his face, raising an eyebrow slightly. This was not what he was used to - women did not behave this way where he was from. But then a lot of things here were not the way things were where he was from. He raised an eyebrow as she stumbled over his name, wondering if it was worth correcting her. "PhoeBUS." He muttered with a grin.

He considered putting her down as she started squirming, worried about dropping her, but she was so small that he didn't think he'd have much problem keeping hold of her. He began to walk towards the table, with the idea of at least sitting her on a chair so she wasn't too much of a danger to herself, when she started pulling at her shirt again. He looked away as she pulled her top up a little, feeling slightly uncomfortable at the exposed flesh, and set her down on the chair as she reached it.

"Really mademoiselle, how about we just keep our clothes on? I'll get you that water, that'll help you cool down." He turned to someone nearby and asked them to fetch him some glasses of water, before turning back to the girl. "So, do I get the pleasure of your name, or are you just going to remain the mysterious drunken lady?" He grinned at her, taking a glass of water as it was handed to him, and offering it to the girl.

[Judy Hopps]

"Pheebus---Peebus---Penis," Judy finally concluded, before giggling. She was pretty sure that was a naughty word, or at least it sounded naughty to her right now, though it was hard to really get her thoughts all that organized and straight. Where were they heading again? Oh, a chair! Judy clambered onto it, momentarily forgetting about her shirt for a moment. Apparently Penis hadn't forgotten, since he was tugging it right back.

"I wasn't gonna take it all off," protested Judy, frowning up at him. 'I do got a bra on and stuff," she tugged the collar of her shirt slightly, but she didn't seem quite able to pull it enough to show it off. She mumbled something at that, likely moving to start unbuttoning to try and get that out in the open too (it's safe to assume that Penis would not allow this. Since Penis was of course the very model of chivalry).

Oh, a question! Judy could answer those! "Officer Judy Hopps," she said, giving a strangely crisp salute that threatened to knock her over backward. "Reporting for duty, Sergeant Penis!"Yep, that deserved a giggle. She just couldn't quite hold it in.

[Phoebus]

Did she call him... he shook his head, figuring he'd misheard her. Ladies didn't use words like that, they didn't refer to that particular area at all - although Phoebus had to remind himself again that he wasn't at home anymore. Things were different here, and although the women he'd met so far had been from at least a somewhat similar society to him, this one clearly wasn't. He was just going to have to roll with it, and put his embarrassment aside for a while.

Although he still didn't think allowing this girl to pull her clothes off in public like this was a good idea. He didn't know what a bra was, but he was pretty certain he didn't want to see it. Or - he probably did, but he knew he shouldn't. He grabbed her hand as she started to fumble with her top again, and held it just tight enough that she couldn't pull away and return to her mission.

As she saluted he dodged a hand that came very close to smacking him in the face with a grin. "Officer? Are you in the army, Officer Hopps?" Ah, no, he hadn't misheard her. She was definitely calling him penis. That really wasn't how he wanted to be known... "It's PhoeBUS." He repeated, wondering how he could make it easier for her. Apparently she had no problem with his title. "How about you just call me Sarge for now?" He grinned, pressing the cup of water into her hand. "Come on then, Officer, drink up."

[Judy Hopps]

"Nope," said Judy as he asked if she were in the army. "I'm a cop," she jutted a thumb at her chest, very nearly knocking herself off her seat as she did. She settled herself against the nearest object, which just happened to be Penis. Steadying herself there felt a bit off, but, well, it wasn't like he wasn't offering to be helpful and all chivalrous and stuff. Very helpful, Sir Penis was.

And he was repeating his name for some reason. Judy frowned up at him. "I know your name is Penis," she repeated, not quite sure why he was being so insistent. She reached for the water, taking it and sipping it. It didn't taste quite as good as what she'd had before, and she pulled a slight face, half tempted to ask. Except that even while pretty darn drunk, Judy was still Judy. There was still a part of her telling her that she really shouldn't be drinking anything else right now.

Plus, there was some instinctive part of her that would naturally follow the orders of anyone named Sarge, she guessed. "Sure thing, Sarge," she said, giving him another sloppy salute. The gesture knocked against her drink, splashing water on her shirt. The sudden cold made her squeal, jumping up to her feet, which might very well mean either stepping or knocking against Sarge Penis when she moved. "I'm all wet!" probably wasn't helping either.

[Phoebus]

"Well I have no idea what a cop is, but it sounds..." He stopped as she fell against him, and placed a hand on her back to steady her. "Careful." He grinned, keeping his hand on her back to make a quick catch if needed. "Don't want you hurting yourself."

He considered arguing the name issue again, but he figured at this point it was pretty futile. He just rolled his eyes instead, glad that she was at least drinking the water. Or spilling it all over herself... He gave a small sigh, taking the glass from her and placing it on a nearby table.

"Oh, you are just going to make my evening all kinds of interesting, aren't you?" He muttered, more to himself than to her. He paused for a second, looking at the water soaking her shirt, and sighed, taking off his jacket. "You know what, despite my best efforts tonight, I think you're going to win on the getting your shirt off front." He held up his jacket so that she was shielded from prying eyes. "Get that wet shirt off, and you can wear my jacket instead." He looked away slightly, to try and preserve her dignity. His jacket was going to swamp her, but at least she wouldn't catch hypothermia.

[Judy Hopps]

"A cop is an officer of the law," Judy informed him primly, nearly giggling at her own primness. It just seemed so funny for some reason. As did the whole drinking thing. And spilling. Actually just being here in this not furry body was pretty funny if you stopped to think about it. Life was just funny if you thought about it even more.

Judy didn't quite catch the muttering because of, well, the giggling. She looked down at her own shirt, pulling it away from her skin and looking down the hole it made. "Huh, those are definitely bigger," she mused, tilting her head to the side speculatively. A jacket shadowed her, and she looked up, realizing what he was saying.

"Yay!" she cried, unbuttoning her shirt. OR, well, trying. "stupid buttons," she mumbled, pulling and jerking at them. Some popped, arching up to connect with Penis's cheek. "Oops, sorry" said Judy, reaching up to swipe at the hair by her ear. "Buttons are really hard," she said, before finally pulling her shirt off. Fortunately she had a sports bra on underneath, the gray covering more than some people would ear naturally. She held the wet shirt out to him, smiling. "There you go! Shirt's off!"

[Phoebus]

"Aren't you a bit small for an officer of the law?" He asked with a raised eyebrow. Most of the scoundrels he'd had to deal with in his maintaining of the law back home and had been pretty gruesome, and he was struggling to see how this little one would be able to handle anyone like that. Or maybe the criminals were smaller where she came from?

He quickly averted his eyes as she started studying herself, holding the jacket up a little higher. He wasn't sure he'd ever been this uncomfortable in his life - women just did not behave this way, or talk about certain parts of their anatomies the way this girl did. He didn't know what to do with himself, but he was fighting an overwhelming urge to laugh at the sheer craziness of this whole situation. He couldn't help but ask though... "Bigger than what?" Although he wasn't sure his sense of propriety, which was hanging by a thread, would be able to handle the answer.

He flinched slightly as he felt the button hit his cheek, barely missing his eye, and fought the impulse to look over his jacket at what she was doing. He was trying to work out he could help but still maintain her dignity, when he was suddenly confronted with the wet shirt. "Right... erm..." He took the shirt from her and draped it over his shoulder, wrapping the jacket around her quickly. As suspected, it drowned her.

"Well, it'll do - at least you're not wet or exposed." He grinned at her, satisfied at the completion of his chivalrous duties to the young lady.

[Judy Hopps]

"Please," said Judy waving off the comment, "size doesn't matter." She seemed to realize what she'd said after the fact and giggled some. Which would make the whole getting changed thing a bit harder, and it was already harder. But at least she'd gotten the shirt off, and now had his too large jacket on. Given Judy's tiny frame, she was all but smothered in the jacket. She might have been less covered if she'd gone and found a tent to throw over her body.

"Nope, not wet or exposed!" she chirped in agreement. She looked down, reaching into the jacket to feel some of her skin. "Well, not exposed," she said, shrugging again. She swung her legs for a few moments, looking around and considering. "The alcohol is a lot stronger here than where I'm from. I guess that's because I'm used to drinking stuff made for rabbits instead of hoo-mans," Judy narrowed her eyes, looking up at Penis. "you're a hoo-man, right Sergeant Penis? Why aren't you all--" she paused for a moment, mostly because the world just lurched and her stomach did a turn she did not appreciate.

[Phoebus]

He couldn't help but grin at her comment, shrugging. "Good to know." He muttered, raising an eyebrow at her. He looked at her in the jacket and tried to smother a laugh - it was absolutely enormous on her and made her look even smaller than she was, like a child wearing their parent's clothing. "Well, you won't catch your death, that's the main thing." He said with a nod. He reached for what was left of the water and offered it to her. "Try to drink it rather than wear it this time, Officer." He grinned.

He glanced around as she spoke, looking for his own drink, when he heard his wonderful new nickname again. "Sarge - we'll stick with Sarge, ok?" He said with a cringe and a roll of his eyes. He suddenly realised what she'd been saying, and turned to stare at her. "Wait, did you say rabbits?" Fine, he could let that slide - she wasn't saying she was a rabbit after all. "Erm, yeah, I'm human, why aren't I what?" He caught the look on her face and his own fell as he quickly tried to move aside, praying he would be quick enough.

[Judy Hopps]

Judy took the water, actually managing to hold it mostly steady. She took a sip, the saner part of her mind again taking over for a short bit. Everything was still quite fuzzy, fuzzy to the point where the world nearly spun and everything to more than a little blurry. Plus, again, part of her was just using to following orders.

So sip the water.

Sarge, stick to sarge. "Yeah, rabbits," she said, looking up at him, her eyes narrowing while she swayed. "I'm a bunny," dead serious, "Officer Judy Hopps of the Zootopia PD," she tapped her chest, "first of my kind on the force too. Top of my--class,' she swayed again, before--

yeah, there was the vomit. At least Judy held it until Penis got out of the way. And at least it was mostly alcohol and water... and carrots.