one day this will fade {open}

[Mordred Le Fey]

Mordred laughed at Costin’s questions. “Nope, no honour in bar fighting whatsoever, mate. You want honour, pick up a sword and head to the tourney stadium and challenge a knight.” He sipped his scotch slowly, savouring the smoothness. It paid to be rich. He took Costin’s coat with a smile, feeling a sense of excitement as he watched his new friend make his way across the bar.

He had no idea how this was going to go, but he knew that it was going to be utterly priceless.

He placed his glass back on the bar, and pulled out his phone, quickly switching to camera mode and filming Costin as he accosted his target. He heard his words and snorted - this guy certainly had a way with words. Mordred almost held his breath as he waited for the target’s response.

[Costin Dracula]

The response to Costin's insult wasn't immediate; it turned out that the guy was pretty drunk, and stared up at him blankly for a few seconds. Costin could see the exact moment he put the pieces together, because the guy's eyebrows came up in surprised realization, then immediately drew together in an angry scowl. He stood up, drawing himself up to his full height (which turned out to be a good three or four inches taller than Costin, and at least half again as wide).

Now, Costin rarely apologized, but if there was anything that could reliably compel him to do so, it was physical danger. He should really just tell this man he was sorry and back away, tell him he'd mistaken him for someone else, but...he could feel Mordred's eyes on him, and he knew he couldn't back down now.

"That's right," he pressed on, "you heard me. You have the face of a crushed cockroach."

"You wanna take this outside?" the guy demanded, and Costin hesitated. If he took it outside, would it still count as a bar fight? He couldn't turn around and ask Mordred, that would take the aggression right out of it.

"No," he said, puffing his chest out, "no, I think we should do this right here."

The guy reached out with one large fist and took hold of the front of Costin's shirt, yanking him towards himself, and for a split second, Costin froze. A cold rush of déjà vu surged through him.

You stupid boy.

Costin brought one fist up into the larger man's gut, which didn't do much damage because of the amount of cushioning his opponent was working with, but it did accomplish the goal of getting him out of the man's grasp. He stumbled back, into a table behind him, recovering quickly enough to grab the first thing that touched his hand. It turned out to be a plate, which Costin chucked towards the oncoming threat. It missed by quite a lot and shattered on the wall beside him, but the fist the man threw at Costin's face was much more accurate. The punch landed solidly on the side of his face, whipping his head around and sending him staggering back again, one hand coming up to clutch at the pain that blossomed out from the point of impact.

"You had enough yet, fancy kid?" Costin bent over, hands on his knees, acting as if he was catching his breath, then launched himself forward, driving his shoulder into the man's stomach and chest, pushing him back onto another table and sending a few patrons scattering. He pulled his arm back to line up a punch, and it was at that moment that he felt someone grab him from behind.

"Let me go!" Costin snapped. "Let me go, he deserves this, he deserves everything I can throw at him!"

[Mordred Le Fey]

This was going better than Mordred could have imagined. He watched with glee as Costin insulted the drunk, as the drunk got to his feet and turned out to be substantially bigger than Costin, and as the drunk grabbed Costin. For a brief second, Mordred wondered if he should step in, save Costin before it all went too far and he got hurt. The moment passed pretty quickly though, and Mordred just stood and watched, impressed as Costin threw his first punch and a plate. He was making a good start, Mordred thought, continuing to film the events.

He winced as he watched the drunk punch Costin hard, and put the phone away, deciding now was the time to step in. Costin surprised him again by pushing the guy over, and Mordred didn’t rush, sauntering over slowly, intrigued to see where things were going to go.

He rolled his eyes when Todd stepped in, grabbing Costin’s arm. Slipping in between Costin and his new friend, Mordred held his arms up, palms facing the drunk, and gave him his most charming smile. “Excuse my friend, he’s gotten a little over excited.” He pulled out a wad of cash and counted out some notes. “How about you take this, scuttle off to whatever hole you live in, and we leave it at that?” He handed the drunk some notes, before turning to Costin. “All good Todd, although you could have let him get a proper punch in first. I’m trying to teach him and you interrupted the lesson.” Todd shrugged and released Costin, before heading back to the bar.

“Well. A good first attempt, but I do have notes. First, what was all that shouting about? What did he deserve? Far too emotionally involved there Costin.” Mordred clapped him on the shoulder. “But still, points for effort.”

[Costin Dracula]

Costin was not amused. By the time he got back to the bar, a dark scowl had inhabited his face, and he grabbed his glass, taking a sip far too big for the quality of the liquor. Something had just happened, and he wasn't sure what it was. There was no reason why he should have been as angry as he was at that man; Costin had picked the fight, and he hadn't even meant to get as into it as he had. His face hurt, he was pretty sure he looked all out of sorts, and he wasn't pleased that he'd gotten that carried away.

"You didn't have to...that man did nothing to me," Costin pointed out. As if that had ever stopped him from bothering anyone before. "Other than..." He gestured towards his face. "And that was because I came at him first. I don't think I like bar fighting."

You stupid boy. God, why did he keep thinking that? It felt like getting a song stuck in his head but not quite being able to remember what the song was, just having a few words and the hint of a melody there, buzzing around and popping up unwarranted.

He set his glass down, realizing that he was a little too out of breath to be dealing with it at the moment. His head was spinning, and his mouth felt dry.

"What was in those pills you gave me?" he asked, glancing over at Mordred. "What did you do?"

[Mordred Le Fey]

As the moved back to the bar, Mordred signalled to Todd, and by the time they reached the bar Todd was offering Mordred an ice pack. He took it, and offered it to Costin as Costin took a large drink. Mordred didn't respond to Costin's anger, feeling that at this moment Costin needed to rage, and nothing Mordred could say just yet would help. Instead, he sipped his drink slowly, levering himself onto a bar stool and leaning on the bar, watching Costin with interest. There was a lot going on below the surface, and Mordred couldn't help but be intrigued. As someone with numerous issues of his own, he liked to know he wasn't alone. It was part of the reasons he liked having Aiden as a housemate.

He watched as Costin clearly began to react, his breath quickening, and before he even needed to signal to Todd there he was with a glass of water. Mordred offered it to Costin, remembering the first few times he had taken those pills, and the come-down had not been fun. But at least Gostin wasn't on his own, like Mordred had been.

"Drink this, it'll help." He said quietly as he held out the glass of water. "And get that ice pack on your cheek." He took another drink of the scotch, passing Todd another couple of notes. He was good, he deserved the extra Mordred could give him.

"I didn't do anything, Costin, that was all you. The pills are harmless, you'll be fine." He placed his glass back on the bar, and turned to face Costin fully, folding his arms across his chest. "So what's the deal with you? That was an impressive flip."

[Costin Dracula]

Costin grabbed the ice pack out of Mordred's hand and pressed it to the side of his face, resting both elbows on the surface of the bar as he tried to calm his breathing. God, why had he decided to do this? What had made him think this was a good idea? Drugs, that was what. He had taken drugs from a guy he'd just met, and this was the consequence. When was he ever going to learn that he couldn't keep acting like he was invincible while he was still trapped in this body?

"I don't have a deal," he said, taking the water and drinking it down in one lengthy series of sips. "What do you mean, what's my deal? I was trying to do what you told me to do, for...you know, the human experience."

That was, of course, not even close to the truth, but despite the camaraderie he and Mordred seemed to have developed that night, Costin reminded himself that Mordred actually didn't know him. He knew Costin's name, and that his fathers were vampires, but Costin was pretty sure he hadn't given him much beyond that, and in his current condition, he had no inclination to do so. It took a moment or two before he started to feel like he could breathe again, like something wasn't reaching into his chest and crushing all the air out of his lungs. There was really no reason for him to even be this out of breath; he'd taken one punch and shoved someone around once or twice, it wasn't ten rounds of high-stakes boxing.

"I need to get some air," he said, grabbing his glass of scotch and pouring the remainder of it down his throat.

[Mordred Le Fey]

Mordred simply raised an eyebrow at Costin's response, quietly sipping his own drink while Costin fumed. "Perhaps we should put the 'human experience' on hold for a bit. Not everyone can handle my version. Even I had to build up to it. I started you too hard, too fast - apologies, my friend."

As Costin drained his scotch, Mordred moved the bottle out of his reach. "I think it's best if we cut you off for now." He muttered, handing the bottle back to Todd. "Air sounds like a very good idea." He grabbed Costin's arm and let him outside, catching a bottle of water tossed to him by Todd as they left. Gods that man was a superb barman.

As they got outside, Mordred leaned Costin against a wall, unsure how steady he'd be during the come-down, and handed him the bottle of water. He leaned against the wall next to him, pulling out his emergency pack of cigarettes and lighting one. Taking a long drag, he exhaled slowly into the night air, before turning to look at Costin.

"So. How are you doing?"

[Costin Dracula]

It was very like Costin to deflect responsibility for his actions to someone else; he had been doing it most of his life, and had watched his father do the same. Countless times he had seen Dracula charm his way out of a situation that probably should have ended with his execution, and he did it by shifting the blame for his terrible actions onto some other person or phenomenon. And it had been Costin's first instinct, just now, to blame Mordred for his sudden bizarre behavior, but none of this was Mordred's fault, not really. Sure, it had been Mordred who'd suggested that they go off and pick a bar fight, but there was obviously something much deeper in Costin's psyche that was contributing to the way he was reacting to this situation.

He placed one hand flat on the wall outside of the bar, leaning his weight on it, focusing on the lines of bricks between his fingers, and he focused on his breathing, on slowing his heart rate, convincing himself that he could breathe again. Finally, he looked over at Mordred, over the line of his own arm.

"This wasn't your fault," he said, his voice rough but finally calm. "I'm sorry I said that. You're a good teacher. Thank you for helping me." He let go of the wall, and reached over towards the cigarette between Mordred's fingers. "May I?"

[Mordred Le Fey]

Mordred handed the cigarette over to Costin without hesitation. It was the least he could do, he figured, as he pulled out another one and lit it. He couldn't help but laugh slightly at Costin's description of him as a 'good teacher'. It was a little too close to a description of his father for his liking.

"No, I'm a good distraction. I'm a good bad influence. I'm a good person to be friends with if you want to piss off your parents." He smirked, taking a drag and exhaling. "But teacher? Nah." He smoked the cigarette quickly, before flicking it away from him into the night.

"We should have started smaller. Like... tattoos or something." He grinned at Costin. "Look, I know we just met, but you've clearly got some shit going on. If there's anyone who knows about having shit going on, it's me, so..." Mordred fell awkwardly silent, in that manly way of not expressing sentiment but hoping the message still got across.

[Costin Dracula]

Costin took the cigarette, lifting it to his lips with a hand that shook a lot more than he would have liked for it to. "Thanks," he said softly, inhaling deeply and tilting his head back against the wall.

"You can be a good distraction, a bad influence, and a good teacher," he said, giving Mordred a wry smile. "I've learned some things tonight, that's for certain." He exhaled a column of smoke into the night, reaching his free hand up to touch the tender side of his face. "Do you ever feel like...like there's something you don't know about yourself, like you know there's something there that you're missing, but it feels like..."

He was doing a terrible job of explaining this, but that was just the nature of the thing. "This is going to sound vague and very dramatic, but there are moments when I feel...like I'm meeting myself for the first time. Like I've suddenly realized I'm a completely different person than I thought I was, as if I've suddenly changed and I just...wasn't around during the interim."

[Mordred Le Fey]

"Well don't worry, there's no test, if you wake up and you've forgotten it all then no big deal." Mordred said wryly, resting one foot against the wall and tilting his head back to look into the dark sky.

He continued to gaze into the sky as Costin spoke, digging his hands into his pockets. There was something familiar in what Costin was saying. Mordred had never felt fully comfortable with himself, like there was a part of him that was hidden, a part of him he didn't have any control over and didn't fully know or understand.

He pulled out another cigarette, lighting it and taking a drag before answering. "I wonder sometimes if there's something missing." He said slowly, not entirely sure how to explain himself. It wasn't something he'd expressed, not even to Tristian. "Like, the thing that should stop me doing things, should stop me... being so me... just isn't there." He shrugged, taking another drag. "There's a dark side to me. It hasn't shown itself yet, but I can feel it coming."

He didn't admit it to Costin, but it scared him. He didn't know what he was really capable of, but if the books were to be believed then it wasn't good.

[Costin Dracula]

"If I've forgotten it all, you'll just have to teach me again," Costin raised an eyebrow, almost like he was issuing a challenge. Which, as it turned out, he probably was; this was probably a much more complicated endeavor than he or Mordred either might have imagined at the start, and they were only an hour or two into it.

Apparently what he had said made more sense than he had anticipated, because Mordred didn't look at him like he was crazy, and even had something to say about it himself. It was almost funny, Costin thought, milling over Mordred's words. Mordred was afraid of a darkness inside of himself. Costin was afraid of who he would be without the darkness he had always assumed he would have to live in.

"I...hope there's darkness in me I haven't found yet," he confessed. "I want nothing more than to be immortal like my parents, but at the same time, there is...it is a heavy legacy to bear." He lifted the cigarette to his lips again, staring into the curl of smoke that wound its way upward away from him. "It is what I was born for, but I know...I know I will not fully grasp it until the time comes. Sometimes I feel caught between the two worlds, expected to make the most of this one, but knowing it will all go to dust in the end."

[Mordred Le Fey]

He couldn’t help but laugh. “After tonight I’m not sure re-teaching you any of this is such a good idea. Maybe we should spend some time in the gym first, spar a bit and actually make sure you know how to carry yourself in a common bar fight. Then I might let you loose on the drunks again.”

He listened quietly to Costin’s explanation, not fully understanding it and yet understanding more than he would have usually admitted. Mordred had struggled with his own darkness ever since he was a child; beginning as simple jealousy of the other children, of their relationships and their parents, Mordred had released his frustrations on simple childish pranks and tricks. But it had never been enough and he had always pushed further and further, until people started to get hurt. He suppressed a shudder at a memory of a stable boy lying broken and bleeding in the courtyard. Even his mother had taken notice of that one.

“Be careful what you wish for.” He said quietly, shaking his head. “Don’t wish for more darkness than you can handle. Once it takes hold, if you allow yourself to lose control over it - that’s when things get ugly fast.” He watched the smoke from Costin’s cigarette dissipate in the night air. “My two worlds have collided before, and it’s not pretty. I can’t afford for them to collide again - for all my big talk of power and destiny, I don’t want to hurt the people I care about, but sometimes I, scared I won’t have a choice.” His mind drifted back to his reading from earlier that night.

“Gods, this is deep, man.” He said with a grin, a poor attempt to lighten the mood.

[Costin Dracula]

Costin had a momentary vision of himself at a gym, and shuddered visibly. "Can you imagine?" He made a face. "Me, in...one of those awful sleeveless shirts and what, some athletic shorts, punching a wall, or whatever it is?" He shook his head, and took another drag on his cigarette. "Not me, Mordred, not me. I think I'll keep to fighting with my wit until I've got the means to do some real damage."

Mordred said he didn't want to hurt the people he cared about, and that was a concept Costin could run with. He nodded knowingly.

"You see," he explained, "that's why I keep myself from forming attachments. If I don't care about anyone, and they don't care about me, it will all be so much easier for everyone involved when the time comes." As usual, he sort of edged around the actual issue there, the fact that he was convinced that his destiny was to become something that depended on the death of others (or at least, the grievous injury of others) for survival. As much as he believed that vampires were a more highly evolved being, it was understandably strange to stand around amongst people and talk to them openly about how they'd be your dinner someday.

"I don't believe I've ever had a choice," he added, shrugging. "It's...what else could I be, you know? I was born into it...or at least, I have been raised in it. I don't think you can apologize for being what you are, for taking the things you need, for doing the things you must in order to become what you're destined to be."

[Mordred Le Fey]

Mordred couldn't help but laugh at the image Costin created. "Is that what you think I wear in the gym?" He laughed. "Dude, I'm insulted, give me some credit. And no one with any self-respect wears the sleeveless shirts." He lit another cigarette. "You know you'll have to learn to fight and build up some strength if you ever want to move on from that wit of yours."

He smoked slowly, listening to Costin. It made sense, what he was saying, to avoid forming attachments to avoid hurting people with the darkness that was inherently a part of you was sensible, it protected you and them. But it was too late for that for Mordred. The attachments were formed, the emotions and feelings attached to those people were too strong now. Perhaps there was time to save them from himself, perhaps there would be ways to break away from them one by one, but there would still be hurt and pain now, there was no way to avoid it. The damage was already done.

"It must be pretty lonely though," he mused quietly, looking at Costin curiously. "To have no bonds, no attachments. Does that make you truly happy? Even knowing what is to come for you, looking forward to that, surely you must feel isolated, must wish for some kind of intimacy - with anyone?" He shrugged slightly. "Even just for a night, everyone needs attachment every now once in a while."

Destiny... there was a whole new barrel of worms. Mordred didn't respond initially, taking a long drag on his cigarette and exhaling into the night air. "Destiny is a difficult concept." He said after a while. "Who are we to say what our destiny truly is? Who is anyone to say what our paths are, what we will become? Just because it's written, why shouldn't we be able to change it? Erase the pages and rewrite them with our own words."