Armageddon Sale {open}

[Lancelot du Lac]

Levi never should have come here. This was a battleground the likes of which would make the average man quail in fear. Warriors long trained in hidden, specialized arts were practicing their skills in ways that made the average mind tremble. Levi knew that he simply did not have the training to compete with these people. Their training... the years of dedication they had to go through in order to become like this... it was uncanny.

"It's just a sale," muttered Levi. He rubbed the back of his head. There were just... so many people. Levi had come here to shop, obviously, and to take advantage of the sale just like everyone else. However, he hadn't been expecting... this.

"Did that woman just knock that old lady unconscious?" muttered Levi, turning to look. He was pretty sure that just happened. It looked like said woman had actually used a boot to inflict a head injury of some kind. The healer in Levi made him take a step forward. It was altogether likely that he would have gone to the woman, had a hand on his shoulder not stopped him.

"It's a sale," said the owner. She happened to be a middle aged woman, and Levi turned to face her. "She knew what she was getting into. This is how it should be. Go home while you still can."

And the woman disappeared into the crowd. Levi could have sworn he heard her emit a battle cry.

"I just need a gift," he muttered. One thing, something for Gwen. The prices were good enough that his recent windfall would barely have to be touched. It was perfect. Steeling himself, Levi tried entering the whirlwind which was the Armageddon sale.

[flora]

“Hey I saw It first!” Came a whine from over Flora’s shoulder as she held a dress against her frame. She raised a slender eyebrow and turned to the other girl, looming over her with the most bad-ass look she could muster. For a trouble-maker like Flora, she liked to think it was pretty intimidating. The girl shrank back slightly. “Oh did you? Well I grabbed it first, so that makes it mine.” She said, giving it everything but the z-snap.

Marching away from the other shopper, Flora was sure to keep a tight hold on the dress. She looked over her shoulder to ensure her prize would be confiscated. She stumbled as she accidentally tread on the heels over another shopper. “Ack! God!” She yelped, surprised.

When the man turned, she was amused to find the school nurse. “Sorry, man. It’s a little crazy in here, y’know?”

[Lancelot du Lac]

"No kidding,' murmured Levi, scanning the crowd again. "I think I've seen battlefields less chaotic and messy."

Just as Levi spoke, someone literally punched someone else. This would have been a little less remarkable had the puncher not been a decidedly petite little old lady, and the punched not been a little girl of about five or six years old. The blow was loud enough to puncture the din of noise, and certainly loud enough to get Levi to wince sympathetically.

At this time, he looked to the person who'd directly addressed him, and found that his words died on his tongue. She was young-ish, likely a student of some sort, but that wasn't what really caught Levi's attention. Young, he could deal with. What caught his attention was the blazing pink hair, which the relatively conservative knight caught himself outright staring at for several seconds. Just when he thought he'd adjusted to everything in this new world, something like that had to be thrown at him.

Levi pointed, "Do you know that someone's messed with your hair?" he asked. A package of some kind flew between the two of them, working as a better punctuation mark than the question mark. It skid to a halt between them, laying at their feet in a manner that can only be called suspicious.

[flora]

Flora was used to staring, and she really didn’t mind it. She craved it, in fact. What use were spotlights if you couldn’t be in them? She waited for Levi to collect his words, smiling smugly the entire time. It faltered into a look of terror when he pointed and informed her that someone had messed with it.

Messed with it.

The fairy was very proud of her hair and it was the focal point of her perfectly pink vanity. If someone had messed with it…She ran her fingers through her hair, checking to make sure that it was still mid-back length all the way around. She fluffed it through her hands to feel for loose strands, gum, or any other messing.

With one last horrified look at her ends, she breathed a sigh of relief. “Nope! I…uh. Well it’s still pink and long and I guess that’s really all that matters. You freakin’ scared me!” She admonished, twirling her hair protectively in her fingers for a moment.

She looked down at the package that slid between them, eyeing it for only a moment before she stepped behind Levain. Meat shield. Excellent plan.

[Lancelot du Lac]

"Exactly, it's... wait," Levi looked at the woman suspiciously, "did you say it was supposed to be pink? Isn't that--"

Levi cut off as a woman elbowed him out of the way. Considering that Levi was a moderately tall, well-built young man, this was something of a feat. The knight almost lost his balance, even: he certainly stumbled. When he looked at the woman, he was even more surprised, given the fact that she was, in fact, a rather tiny middle aged woman who had the same steely look in her eye that most warriors Levi had fought against had.

"Maybe now's not such a good time to get her a gift," muttered Levi. He turned to look as a group of woman literally descended into violence over what appeared to be a purse of some kind. Levi knew he'd have to actually ask someone for help with this whole thing. He knew in general terms what Gwen liked; fashionable things, old movies, chocolate, lilies, but he'd been somewhat at a loss for figuring out what he was going to get her.

He looked to the pink haired woman again, and his standing still earned him another rough shove. "You wouldn't happen to be a shopping fairy, would you? Or maybe an alien who's here to learn about our culture?'

Levi just wasn't taking chances anymore, really. Part of him was actually hoping for shopping fairy; maybe she could wave her wand and get him out of this mess.

[flora]

Flora laughed outright. “Yes, dude. It is supposed to be pink. Something wrong with it?” She asked good naturedly. She knew it wasn’t the kind of thing a lot of people weren’t used to, and definitely not something the more old-fashioned citizens of Trenale would go for. But she liked it, and that was all she cared about.

Snarling, Flora put her hands against Levi’s back to keep him from stumbling into her feet. “Geeze! Watch it lady!” she snapped, scoffing and flipping her hair over her shoulder. Really this guy obviously had no idea what he was doing. She snorted at him when he asked if she was a shopping fairy.

“Not quite. My name is Flora and I’m a fairy godmother or whatever.” She shrugged. “But I’ll help you. Obviously you totally need me.” She chuckled and pointed her thumb in the direction of the packs of scuffling women. “Not used to this kinda thing, I take it? It’s totally worth it in the end, I swear.”

[Lancelot du Lac]

"You mean besides the fact that it's pink?" replied Levi, raising a brow. It was mostly a point of their conversation to be laid aside. For lo, there was shopping and those doing the shopping, both of which were making themselves quite known to the pair. Levi found his hands drifting down to his side, where his sword should be. It was probably a good thing that he'd opted to leave the blade at home.

"Fairy Godmother," repeated Levi. He nodded; it made sense, though he really didn't want to think about who the poor charge of this creature would be. He gestured toward the crowd. "I don't know the first thing about how to deal with these. Right now, my biggest urge is to separate them and send them to their corners," he sighed, reaching up to rub the back of his head, "but yeah, I need to get something for my--" what the hell did he call Gwen? Technically, Levi was the male version of a mistress, he guessed. Whatever you called that. Lover would probably work. Queen was technically right, though Gwen wasn't technically a Queen yet or something (that was something Levi didn't quite grasp and struggled with).

"Female friend," he finished lamely. He side-stepped an incoming box, staring at the contents for a few moments. "You sure this is worth it? Because I think that could have killed someone..."

[flora]

Flora rolled her eyes, letting the subject of her hair just drop. Some traditionalists were just a little too traditional to bother explaining why having pink hair was pretty much the most awesome thing anyone could do. She didn’t really take much stock in the opinions of others. She liked pink. She liked her hair. End of story.

“Girlfriend.” Flora corrected almost immediately after Levain had finished talking. “She’s your girlfriend because if she was just your friend who happened to be female you would have just called her your friend. And even if she isn’t officially your girlfriend, you’d like her to be.” Arching a smug eyebrow, Flora learned slightly towards Levi. “Am I right, or am I right?”

She leaned back and crossed her arms, looking Levi over. He looked…weary. Not frightened like a child or startled just cautious and weary. Like a warrior. She knew just how to get to him. “Is it worth it?” She paused and hummed slightly. “Let me ask you this: is she worth it?”

[Lancelot du Lac]

"What?" was what Levi mentioned, turning to look at the striking woman with the pink hair. He'd heard her; he couldn't very well not, what with their proximity and all, but he couldn't quite believe what he'd heard. Flora had outright called Gwen his girlfriend, words that Levi wouldn't dare speak for himself. This was probably because the last bit, the bit about how he'd very much like that to be the situation was the bit that was closest to the truth.

Levi brushed that aside for now, instead looking at the throngs of people, again noticing just how very similar this whole situation was to a battlefield, and he'd been on way too many of those.

"Is she... this is just a sale,' insisted Levi, gesturing at the masses. "It's not a matter---she's ---' he took a deep breath, giving Flora a look that communicated a very strong desire toward punching. He instead looked out at the crowds. "She's obviously worth getting a present for, or I wouldn't be here. I'm just not sure that--"

Another package flew by him, then another. On the third projectile, Levi's hand jerked, and he found himself holding what appeared to be a jewelry box of some kind...