The past is a ghost, the future a dream (Robin)

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Marian had heard the stories of these woods, and perhaps it was not the safest place to go wandering, but so long as the stuck close to the forest’s edge then what harm could come to them? Just being here, it reminded her of home. She had been but a child then, but she could still remember sneaking off to meet Robin at the edge of the forest. They would talk and they would play and, as they grew older, they had made plans for the future. Although many unforeseen circumstances had threatened that future, finally it was theirs, so it had seemed appropriate that they come here to talk.

She had been fairly silent for most of the walk, lost in her own thoughts. How was she to tell him? Should she just state it outright and be done with it, or find some way to lead up to it? She was still having a hard enough time coming to grips with the news herself, and the thought of saying it out loud...

Giving Robin’s hand a gentle squeeze, she took a deep breath and glanced over at him.

“Do you remember when you first asked me to marry you?” she asked, smiling a bit at the memory.

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Technically speaking, 'home' for Robin was a manor house, the height of luxury. Right now, it was a small cottage here in Trenale, so there wasn't really any reason he would feel so comfortable walking through the woods.

The fact was, however, was that he'd become so invested in fighting the sheriff, and spent so long with the woods as his base of operations, that he actually did feel quite at home here. It helped that it made him think of Nottingham, and anywhere in Nottingham was home as far as he was concerned.
In fact, anywhere he was with Marian was home, and he turned to smile at her as she spoke.

"I remember every time I've asked you to marry me." He grinned.

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Laughing at the reply, Marian shook her head and gave Robin a playful poke in the ribs with her elbow. After a moment she fell silent, her thoughts drifting again. It had been so long ago. Was it possible to have loved him from the moment she first saw him? She had been so young then, she hadn’t even the faintest inkling what love even was, but thinking back now she couldn’t really remember a time when she had not loved him.

“You know, I always dreamed that my life would turn out this way, but I never could have guessed the road I had to take to get here,” she spoke, glancing over at her husband with a soft smile. She did not mean to dredge up the bad things, nor to harp on the things that had conspired to keep them apart. She truly believed it no longer mattered now that they were together. It was merely a statement of fact.

Mostly she thought if she just spoke enough, eventually she would find the right words.

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Robin nodded sagely. Although he also didn't want to dwell on the negative, or dredge up painful memories, it was still worth taking a moment to marvel at how unexpected life had been.

He never expected to leave Marian at all, although being called away to war hadn't been that surprising, he'd still imagined he would return quickly and they would be wed, he would never have guessed right up until the moment he arrived back in England just how different things would be.

"Still," He said eventually "If we hadn't taken the path we did, would we still be the same people we are now?" Would they appreciate each other the way they did?
He had no doubt they would have been together whatever path they took (despite how many obstacles they had faced).

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Marian contemplated the question a moment. I was true, she certainly would not be the same now if everything had gone as perfect as her dreams. She had endured fear, heartache and anger, and came out of it a stronger person. She had adjusted to this modern life and thrived in a society with such open views on women. It would be difficult to return to her old life when the time came.

Then there were the friends she had made here who had certainly changed her, she believed for the better.

“Just being here has changed me a great deal and that is to say nothing of my experiences before,” she agreed. “I am certainly not the same maiden you left all those years ago now.” It certainly felt like a lifetime ago. Marian shook her head. “But I do not wish to speak of the past,” she said, throwing a quick glance at Robin as they walked. “Do you ever think of the future?”

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"No, you're better." He said, unable to resist the compliment despite her attempt to change the subject - he didn't think she'd mind it that much, he found she never seemed to mind a compliment. Well, unless it was when he was attempting to distract her from something she was angry about, then they didn't always go down as well.

"The future?" He shrugged "I suppose I consider it, think about what we'll do when we go back to Nottingham and such... but at the moment I don't consider it overmuch, I know all I need to know about it, you'll be in it, that's all that matters."

From anybody else, it might have been too mushy or flowery, but he said it so matter-of-factly that it worked for him.

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It was easier now to think of the past without feeling the pain. It was a path she had had to take to get to where she was now, to become this person that stood with him now. Maybe there were times when she still wished it had been easier, but she would not trade what she had now for the world.

“You have to say that, you are my husband,” Marian said with a smile as warm as the sun. Stopping their walk, she turned to face Robin as he made his speech, her heart speeding up a bit as he spoke. She had confessed to him her fears that she may never be able to bear him a child and he had been supportive and optimistic and they had not spoke of it nor their future since. Maybe it was because the possibility saddened him so, or perhaps he truly believed her fears to be silly but did not speak of it so he did not upset her. Or it could be just as he said now, that all that mattered to him was that they would be together. Winding her arms around his neck she kissed him softly. It would express her love and devotion much easier than words ever could.

Stepping back to look up at him she knew it was time.

“I saw a doctor today,” Marian blurted out. She just needed to start talking. Once she begun she would find the perfect words.

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"I'm your husband because I say that, and think it the truth." he retorted, wrapping his arms around her as she came to him. Now that she'd gotten him thinking about the past, he revelled in the fact that he could do such a thing, that he could take her in his arms with no fear of repercussion or interruption (well, mostly) - that they would return home, to their home, together.

"A doctor?" His grip tightened a little, much as he might show courage and fortitude in the face of certain death, the thought of losing her terrified him more than anything else, and it was enough to make his mind fill in the blanks rapidly with doom and despair. It didn't quite show on his face, though there was a slight worry to his questioning look "Why?"

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She felt the apprehension in his embrace, saw the worry in his eyes and immediately regretted her choice of words. Bringing a hand up to brush his hair from his forehead, she tried to smile as reassuringly as she could. Marian herself was still having a hard time believing it to be true; she had not been prepared at all for the news and kept expecting it to be false, or perhaps a dream.

“I have been sick lately, as you know, but as it has lingered much longer than normal I finally chose to see a doctor,” she explained. There was no need to speak of the scene in the bathroom, nor Gwen’s insistence; they could speak of all that later. Biting her lower lip as she gazed up at Robin, many emotions warred within her, but nervousness and hope seemed to outweigh the rest.

“If you were to envision our future together, would there be room in it for another?” Unconsciously her hand had dropped to cover her stomach. It was something she did subconsciously a lot this past year, laying her hand over the scar on her belly, but now it was not the scar beneath her hand that she thought of.

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Her words weren't really helping much, all this talk of being ill and it lingering seemed to hint at something more serious, when all this time she'd just been brushing it off as nothing important.
The question seemed like a complete non-sequitur, and at first he just stared at her, wondering what someone else in their future had to do with anything, and why exactly she would ask that anyway? What did she mean by someone else, because the only sort of person who would actually intrude on their future, other than friends who were sort of assumed to be around anyway, was... was...
His eyes flicked down to where her hand rested and immediately widened.

"You..." He began, finding his mouth go dry and words fail him. Was she really? After they'd thought it wasn't possible, had it really happened? He looked up at her questioningly, waiting for her to confirm.

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Marian watched Robin’s face, hoping it was enough, watching as he put the piece together, his eyes dropping to her belly and the hand that rested there. His eyes widened but he said very little. He was probably as frightened as she had been to hope, to believe, but now she knew she had spent this past year worrying for nothing, and soon he would too.

She nodded quickly.

“I know it is unexpected, I know I have not finished school, but we have not exactly been careful and...” Now that she spoke of it Marian could barely contain her excitement, nor her joy. “We are going to have a child.”

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"Well... That is..." Robin grasped for the words. Yes, she hadn't finished school, but this wasn't exactly a conventional school and they had waited long enough to be married by the standards of their day, so it wasn't like they were too young - and no matter what age they had been, after everything they had been through... well, they weren't exactly lacking in experience.

"That is..." He repeated, still looking for the word that properly expressed the emotion he was feeling. "Fantastic." He beamed eventually, lifting her up by the waist and spinning her round in his enthusiasm. "Wonderful! Just wonderful!" He added, putting her down again and leaning in for a kiss.

"I'm going to be a father!" he told her, as if she wasn't just the one who'd told him. "We're having a baby!"

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Marian practically held her breath awaiting Robin’s reaction. She expected a smile, perhaps a repetition of her words; however he reacted she expected his joy to match her own.

She did not expect this rather stuttered, unsure response. He did not sound happy; he did not even look pleased. Her smile fell and her heart plummeted. He was not happy with the news, he had not even wanted a child after all. That was why he had been so accepting of her fear that she could be barren, that was why he never bothered to speak of the future. He did not care about having an heir; he did not wish to be a father at all.

She could feel the hot stinging of tears welling in her eyes. What was she to do? He was her husband, and she loved him with all of her heart, but now she was to be a mother as well. Never had she imagined he would not be as happy as she. When she thought of telling Robin, she had imagined him taking her into his arms and...

...and suddenly he was doing just that. Letting out a startled noise as he spun her around, it was now Marian’s turn to be stunned to silence as he finally spoke the words she had hoped to hear. Her heart felt light again, her fears subsided and when the tears finally fell they were transformed to tears of joy. Peppering kisses across his lips and cheek, she held him tightly as laughter bubbled up within her. “We are,” she said, her voice a bit choked with emotion.

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He kissed her again, having to resist the urge to start spinning her a second time, unsure if it was wise in her condition (or her delicate stomach, he wouldn't want to make her feel nauseous). In her condition... it was a good job they had a house with an extra room, but it would have to be decorated, and there were things to buy, and he would take the very best care of her that was possible.

"How long? What did the Doctor say? Do you need anything? Do I need to do anything? What can we expect?" he asked, punctuating each question with another kiss. "What are we going to call him? Or her? I suppose we have plenty of time to decide that sort of thing... a baby! We're having a baby!"

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While Robin bombarded her with questions and kisses, Marian could do little more than laugh and smile and just hold him. So this was what pure, unadulterated happiness felt like. Everything in her life seemed almost perfect suddenly: she was on the road to repairing her friendship with Gwen, she was married to the only man she had ever and would ever love, and now they were going to have a child. She should probably be waiting for the other shoe to drop, for something truly terrible to happen to make up for all the good, but for right now she was far too happy and the thought didn’t even cross her mind.

“I could barely pay attention to anything the doctor was saying,” Marian admitted when she was finally able to get a word in edgewise. “All I could think about was this miracle, this life inside me, and this moment... telling you.” She was beaming up at him as she spoke. “I was given a date, though. April tenth.” It sounded so close yet so far away.