Sway With Me (Dusty)

[Deleted]

It was amazing how much could change in one night, or even one moment. When he had first started this plan, when he had first proposed a movie Friday night and saw just how excited and willing Dusty was, Arkady had pegged her as easy. She was just so simple, so happy to be liked, so eager to please, that he had expected he might even get laid the first date, which was certainly a plus in his book. This little dance lesson was just a bonus, a way to get her primed up.

Suddenly everything didn’t seem so clear.

That had been the plan, and he had been ready for it. No attachment, no guilt, just pure enjoyment, and now... a single kiss and he was lost.

He should have been prepared for this, it always started with a kiss, right? He should have been able to shut off his emotions, make that conscious decision to kiss her, and felt absolutely nothing. Instead it had caught even him by surprise, and as much as he tried to deny it, he definitely didn’t feel nothing. He definitely felt more than nothing when he pulled her close, and it definitely wasn’t nothing when he deepened the kiss. He felt...

...he felt something, and it was terrifying.

He wanted to pull away and make a run for it, yet he also didn’t want to let her go. He wanted to convince himself that it was nothing, he needed to shut his emotions off, or at least find that anger that always drove him. So he continued to kiss her, trying to convince himself he felt nothing for her but only further proving that he did.

This was not going to plan at all.

[Dusty Fae]

While everythin’ weren’t so clear for Arkady, everythin’ were becomin’ clearer and clearer for Dusty. This were probably everythin’ she’d ever wanted and wished and hoped for. She always read them fairytales with the princesses fallin’ fer the princes. The princes always saved the princesses and swept them off inta the sunset ta share true love’s first kiss and ride off and live happily ever after.

Dusty felt a sudden connection to those princesses because this just had ta be true love’s first kiss. And that meant a happily ever after too, somewhere along the way, right? Arkady were definitely ‘er prince. He weren’t fightin’ dragons or ogres or witches or evil nasty hags that pushed people down wells or inta ovens, but he were helpin’ ‘er feel comfortable in ‘er own skin. He’d also saved her from sittin’ alone at lunch and stood up for her in class the other day when she’d gotten detention. He could qualify as ‘er hero any day o’ the week.

Dusty wrapped her arms ‘round his neck when ‘e pulled ‘er close. She didn’t want ta let go. She never wanted this ta end. She’d never felt such powerful emotions afore and they kinda scared ‘er, but not enough that she wanted ta run. She kinda liked feelin’ this way because it felt so right, like it were meant ta be this way.

This was somethin’ she’d never expected ‘erself ta feel. She thought that like ‘er momma she’d never fall in love and that it just weren’t fer her. She’d grown up with the idea that she’d haveta get married someday if’n she wanted ta be respectable, but she never thought that she’d even like the man she’d marry.

But this, right here, right now, this changed everythin’.

[Deleted]

Had Arkady known what Dusty was thinking just then he probably would have laughed at the irony. A prince? Yes, he should have been, in the life he was deprived of, and that knowledge had changed him into someone as far from the storybook prince she thought him to be. He was selfish, greedy, and full of so much anger and hate that he could barely see past it to find anything good in his life.

If he could, he might have realised that what was happening right now, with Dusty, definitely classified as something good. for the first time in months, maybe years, he was feeling something for someone that wasn’t loathing or jealousy or betrayal, but instead of embracing the feeling it scared him, and he tried to banish it instead. He tried to ignore how fast his heart was beating and the comfortable pressure of her arms around him. He could tell himself it felt good for what it was, and because he had been without anything close since he’d been sent here, and not because of who he was with. Yet somehow when he finally broke the kiss he didn’t end the embrace, he didn’t want to move away from her, and instead of having some flippant comment ready he could only stare down at her with slightly widened eyes.

Dusty was definitely right about one thing: this did change everything, and Arkady was sure he wasn’t going to like those changes.

[Dusty Fae]

Dusty had no idea that Arkady weren’t the prince she imagined ‘im to be, but she wanted him ta be. And ta her he was all that and more. Her mind were made up. She were a princess and she’d found Prince Charming. Little Dusty Fae, who no one ever thought that much of, had gone and found ‘erself a prince. She’d been swept off ‘er feet and it were likely she’d never come down offa this cloud again.

She felt safe in Arkady’s arms. There was a sense of security and almost peace that seemed ta just come over her and she weren’t quite sure what ta make of it. There were few times in ‘er life that she’d ever felt real safe, and this were one of ‘em. She felt like this were where she’d always be safe, no matter how terrible things got. She’d be safe right here.

And then the kiss ended and it took a moment fer her eyes ta flutter open and she found she could breathe again. Bein’ able ta breathe felt real odd too, but that mighta had somethin’ to do with how fast ‘er heart were beatin’. Actually, she couldn’t be sure because she gone right back ta not bein’ able to move again. She could only stare back up at Arkady, just as mute as she’d been afore and wonder what were gonna happen now.

[Deleted]

So now they were just standing there, mutely staring at each other. This was wonderful. Just freaking wonderful. Why this girl? Why did he have to pick her? He could have found some goth chick who was just as unpopular, but who knew what she was doing and had no qualms against just jumping him and tearing his clothes off. That he could have dealt with with little to no feelings, he was sure of it, but this... this innocent, naive, too sweet for her own good, helpless little cowgirl was in a whole other category.

Wait... what was he thinking? Get it together, Arkady. Remember Halloween, he reminded himself, drawing the memory back to the forefront of his mind. Sweet she may seem, but she was hardly helpless. She carried a knife to class for Christ’s sake! And on Halloween, not all that long ago in the full scheme of things, she had pulled a loaded gun on him, just because he had teased her and upset her. Clearly there was something wrong with her, she was just a few insults away from losing her mind. He couldn’t seriously be standing here thinking he had any sort of feelings for her, could he?

So it had felt good to kiss her, so what? It felt good to kiss any girl as long as they weren’t completely inept. Everything else he could just chalk up to the role he was playing. He enjoyed spending time with her because this would just be
excruciatingly painful if he didn’t try to delve deep enough into the role to not despise it. It all meant nothing, and when it was all over he would have exactly what he wanted and he could forget she even existed.

Having managed to talk himself out of the haze he had been under, Arkady’s mouth turned up into a grin.

“Well, I would say that lesson number one was definitely a success,” he finally broke the silence, a playful note in his voice. He was back on track, and he was ready to handle whatever came next.

[Dusty Fae]

Dusty were certainly sweet and innocent and naïve. She were only marginally helpless and she wished she were a cowgirl. She wanted a lot in ‘er life, but that didn’t mean she were gonna get it just ‘cause she wanted it.

She probably coulda been just like Arkady if’n she’d had a different disposition right from the start. She coulda been mean and jealous and wanted ever’thin’ that e’erbody else had. The coulda been the meanest girl in town if’n things had been just a bit diff’rent. She coulda been an outlaw or a bandit or even a saloon girl like ‘er momma, looting and not carin’ ‘bout anyone else. Ever. Instead of a sweet little cowgirl wannabe, she coulda been a mean, coldhearted girl who cared fer nothin’ in the world but wantin’ and gettin’ what other folks had. But with all the bad in ‘er life, somewhere along the line, somethin’ good had happened and made ‘er who she were instead o’ who she coulda been.

Dusty could help but let a smile slowly spread across her face and she giggled. She’d been so caught up in that kiss that she’d forgotten that they’d been dancin’ atall. “Yeah, I s’pose you’re right.” Now that she thought ‘bout it, she’d done better’n ever. And then she’d been kissed by the boy she were sweet on. Today was goin’ so well!

[Deleted]

His arms still wrapped comfortably around Dusty’s waist, Arkady was content to just stand there like this for a while. The music started to filter back in again, the world resumed its turning, and time had started ticking along again. Whatever insanity had overtaken him a moment ago was now tucked securely in the back of his mind, and his thoughts were finally straight again. He had his goal back in focus and his plan was back on track.

He just had to make sure to keep it that way.

Ducking his head down so their eyes were more level, there was a definitely hint of mischief in the curve of his smile. “What do you think, should we try that again?”

He didn’t clarify whether he meant the dancing of the kiss. That was for her to decide.


((New song: You Always Hurt the One You Love ~ The Mills Brothers ))

[Dusty Fae]

While Arkady was just fine and dandy, Dusty weren’t quite so dandy. She were still all addle-brained. She couldn’t think properly, she just knew that she liked bein’ held like this and especially like Arkady. In the state she were in she’d probably be prone ta do somethin’ rash. And with ‘er arms still wrapped ‘round Arkady’s neck she were pretty sure she didn’t wanna move away right away.

It really weren’t fair ta ask that question though and not clarify what ‘e meant by it. Was ‘e talkin’ ‘bout dancin’ or the kiss? ‘Cause she wanted ta kiss ‘im again, but if’n she kissed ‘im and he’d been talkin’ ‘bout dancin’ then she’d feel awful embarrassed. But if’n ‘e meant the kiss and she said yes ta dancin’ would ‘e be disappointed? Gosh this were awful confusin’. Well, it was a coin toss, so ta speak.

Well, logically Arkady was right here and she’s have ta pull away ta dance, so that left only one option really. “Yes,” she said decisively. Then she leaned in, standin’ on ‘er toes a bit, closed ‘er eyes and pressed her lips against his.

[Deleted]

With Dusty being the way she was, Arkady half expected her to just assume he meant dancing and prepare for the next lesson. More than half, to be honest; so when she actually took the initiative to kiss him he was a little surprised. More than a little, to be truthful.

Returning the kiss, this time he was able to keep all thoughts and feelings out of it and just enjoy it for what it was. Maybe he had been going about it all wrong. He shouldn’t be thinking about the plan, or worrying about what he was feeling; he should just be ignoring everything but the taste of her lips and the warmth of her body against his. Turn off the brain, ignore the heart, and just let the body make all the decisions.

Pulling her closer, their bodies flush, he started to sway slightly with the music. The kisses were slower, more exploratory, now that he wasn’t trying so desperately to banish all confusion from his heart. Live in the moment, that’s all he had to do. Don’t look to the future, don’t worry about anything, just enjoy something simple and pure for once, just pretend that there would be no consequences.

For just a few minutes he managed to believe it.

[Dusty Fae]

Dusty weren’t always the most confident person in the whole world. She probably woulda never kissed Arkady if’n he hadn’t kiss ‘er first and then didn’t let go. And it helped that she liked ‘im an awful lot too. But she didn’t think she had anythin’ ta worry ‘bout if she kissed ‘im. So she did. And she were awful glad she did too.

This kiss was different than the last one, but they were still nice. She liked this, kissin’ Arkady. He were the first boy she’d ever kissed and she really liked it. She could live in this moment forever. Honest. This were one o’ the few times that she weren’t embarrassin’ ‘erself or bein’ strange and odd. She were just bein’ Dusty. And Arkady didn’t seem ta mind.

She allowed ‘erself ta melt into ‘im. And when ‘e began ta sway she allowed ‘erself to move to the music too. This day was perfect. They had danced together, perfectly. Then he had kissed her. And then she kissed him. And it was perfect. It was her perfect fairy tale that fin’ly fallin’ inta place. And it were perfect.

[Deleted]

For what seemed like a long while they stayed like that, content in each other’s company and embrace; Arkady found it was easy once he flipped that little switch turning off both his brain and his emotions. Thinking about it, or letting himself feel anything only got him in trouble. Thinking about what he was letting himself feel despite his best efforts was worse. No, it was better to not think at all, just let things happen.

Everything must end sometime, though, and in this case the music was the first, though it took a few minutes for that fact to click in. They just continued to sway to the music that was no longer playing, lost in the moment, perhaps lost in each other. Finally noting the silence, Arkady pulled away just slightly, and in that brief second that he glimpsed Dusty - eyes still closed, cheeks flushed, lips slightly swollen - even despite his best efforts he couldn’t help but feel something... something rather strong, but he refused to name it nor acknowledge it.

“It’s getting late,” he said, voice quiet and a bit hoarse. “Maybe we should go...”

He suggested it, but he made no move to do so.

[Dusty Fae]

Dusty were so completely and totally lost in this moment that she wouldn’ta known if’n it were days passin’ by or minutes. How could yah even tell? Did it even matter? No, prob’ly not. Time didn’t seem to exist right now and that were just fine by her. Honest, she didn’t care how much time passed, as long as it were like this.

And then it were over. Again. The music had stopped and Arkady were sayin’ somethin’. Words. He were sayin’ words. It took ‘er a minute ta comprehend that the words were forming sentences with meaning. She blinked slowly. It was getting late and maybe they should go. Maybe they should go, but Dusty didn’t want to.

And then a though struck her. What did this mean about them? Were they together, now? Dusty weren’t so sure. Maybe. But things were awful diff’rent here than back home. Back home she never woulda kissed anyone like that until she were engaged. And she never woulda been allowed ta dance with a boy alone. There woulda had to be a chaperone. But it were diff’rent here. It were a lot diff’rent here.

She felt kinda strange askin’, but she needed to know. She didn’t know what ta think. She couldn’t leave without knowin’, that much she knew. So she hardened her resolved and asked. “What does this mean ‘bout us?” Her voice were quiet, but not embarrassed. “I ain’t really sure how things work ‘round here.”

[Deleted]

Well, Arkday had to give her credit for being so direct. Most girls he’d known liked to play aloof at first, thinking it would make the boys more interested if they seemed less interested, or ‘cool’ about the whole thing. Dusty wasn’t worried about being alluring or mysterious, she was ready to slap a label on their relationship already and this wasn’t really their official first date.

This was certainly a point in his favour.

Pulling away a bit further, putting a bit of distance between them though not leaving the embrace completely. Moving one hand to rest on her hip, he brought the other up to brush his fingers through her hair. Time for the final scene of act one. Steeling himself against his inner revulsion at having to play such a weak, annoying roll, he shrugged one shoulder. “I’m not sure how things work here either, but I thought...” trailing off, he turned on a bit of the lost puppy look, not to be confused with the wounded puppy look. The lost one looked more hopeful than hurt. “What do you want it to mean? About us?”

The whole act was pretty uneven at times, but she didn’t seem to notice. All that seemed to matter to her was that an attractive boy was interested in her. For Arkady’s plan, that was certainly a good thing.

[Dusty Fae]

Dusty hadn’t meant ta be forward, but it were somethin’ she needed ta know. She weren’t good at playin’ coy and aloof anyhow. And to be real honest, this might possibly be ‘er first relationship, if that’s what this were. She were confused.

When it came ta boys Dusty were lost. She was unprepared for anythin’. She weren’t like ‘er momma. She didn’t understand boys or anythin’ about them. And she didn’t have a daddy or a brother ta help ‘er work things out. She didn’t really have any male role models in ‘er life so o’ course she had no idea what she were doing. That’s why she’d asked in the first place, ‘cause she had no idea what to expect or what to think.

When Arkady pulled away she loosened ‘er grip ‘round ‘is neck. Dusty looked up at ‘im, lettin’ ‘im have his say. Which weren’t much, if’n she were honest. That weren’t the answer she were lookin’ fer. She wanted somethin’ a bit more concrete than that. She didn’t want the question to be turned back ‘round ta her.

She didn’t know how ta put ‘er feelins inta words. But ‘e looked so darn hopeful that maybe he wanted a relationship too? Oh gosh, she didn’t know what she were doin’ at all. But she had ta try. She at least owed Arkady that much. She moved one of ‘er hands to ‘is shoulder, brushin’ off an invisible speck o’ dust, her eyes followin’ ‘er hand. “Um, well, er…I dunno how it put it. I don’t wanna scare yah off or nothin’ ‘cause I really like you.” She risked a glance up at ‘im, the hand on ‘is shoulder just resting there. “Back home you’d haveta come ‘round ta ask my momma if’n we could go courtin’. But I don’t think it works like that here. And momma’s back home so yah cain’t ask ‘er, ‘less yah wanna write ‘er.” She weren’t makin’ any sense were she? She bit ‘er bottom lip for a second, tryin’ ta think ‘bout what she were tryin’ ta say. “I guess what I’m tryin’ ta say is that I ain’t sure. I ain’t sure how ta say what I mean. I dunno. I guess I wanna date you, I think is the term I’m lookin’ fer. But only if you want to.” Gosh, she felt awful stupid now, so she ducked ‘er head hopin’ Arkady didn’t think she were as stupid as she felt.

[Deleted]

Of course it stood to reason that her views on relationships were very traditional, or at least what Arkady would consider traditional. On thing was for sure: he was sure glad that things did not work that way here. If h had to actually go ask a girl’s mother permission to ‘court’ her... well, he certainly wouldn’t be jumping into any relationships very fast. Not that that was what he wanted with any girl, let alone some no-name, unpopular country bumpkin, but if he had to go through all that trouble he certainly wouldn’t have even thought of attempting this scam.

Finally she got to the point of it all after much rambling. he took the guilt she caused when she told him she really liked him and turned it into anger; it was the only way he could deal with it. It was much easier to be angry with her for making him feel guilty that to be angry with himself for doing something to feel guilty about. Still, despite that, when he looked at her he smiled. The bottom line was that she wanted to date him, and that was all he needed to know.

“I want to,” he assured her, the smile a pretty good facsimile of happiness if he did say so himself. Time to play it up a bit, really go in for the kill. Reaching up to take her hands from his shoulders with both of his own, Arkady held them against is chest. “Dusty Fae, will you be my girlfriend?” he asked grandly. Ugh, I think I’m going to make myself sick. “Though I would rather not have to write your mother...”